Names with lots of nicknames are everywhere. It’s why you’re not sure if your new colleague Elizabeth is a Liz or a Beth. And it’s the reason Robert makes a point of saying “please call me Rob” after every introduction.
And yet, parents sometimes raise a wary at eyebrow at nickname-rich names. After all, life is complicated. Having your everyday use match your legal identity? There are plenty of good reasons to embrace this approach.
But names with lots of nicknames come with plenty of benefits, too. So before you drop Margaret, Charles, and Evangeline from your list, consider these ten reasons to embrace nickname-rich choices.
THE UPSIDES OF NICKNAME-RICH NAMES
It frees us to use cute – even cutesy! – short forms.
Not sure if Lulu works on a district attorney? Fretting that Freddie won’t be taken seriously someday?
Put Louisa and Frederick on their birth certificates. And then they can choose a sweet short form for their entire lives … or gracefully grow into their longer name.
Formal names signal the gravity of a special occasion.
In religious and academic ceremonies, a formal name is the equivalent of a well-cut suit.
Make no mistake – Callie can earn a PhD and a Nobel prize, too, but Caroline might be the dressed-up name to engrave on the medal.
It’s worth noting that there’s almost always choice involved. Maybe you’re Max instead of Maximilian at your casual, backyard wedding – but if you’d ended up marrying in a cathedral, Maximilian could have felt like the appropriate choice.
That’s the beauty of names with lots of nicknames – they dress up and down.
Nicknames can honor a loved one while still making space for individual identity.
Naming a child after grandma Betsy is simpler if her given name is Elizabeth. You, too, can write Elizabeth on the birth certificate but call your little girl Eliza.
It can even make a family name dance. Katherine might always the firstborn girl’s name in your family, but Kiki is your daughter.
Formal names can soften a trendy or risky name.
Let’s say you love breezy, modern Jax, but aren’t sure how you’ll feel about it in twenty years.
Naming him John or James Xavier leaves space for Jax to keep his edgy nickname name or change it to Jack or Jamie or James down the road.
Names with lots of nicknames can feel affectionate.
Nickname-rich choices make it easy to distinguish between your public and private selves.
The dentist calls you William. But only your sister knows when you’re Will, Billy, or Bud.
Of course, she might also call you Swamp Monster or Billykins. That’s traditionally how nicknames operated. But there’s plenty of space for names that aren’t quite so out-there to serve as affectionate, in-family kind of terms of endearment.
Sharing names gets a little easier with nickname-rich names.
Two classmates named Ava will always be Ava S. and Ava R.
But two classmates named Isabella might be Isabella and Bella. Or Izzy and Bea. They’ll both have choices.
Names with lots of nicknames function even better in extended families. Maybe you and your brother both want to name your sons after dad. But his Robert answers to Robbie, while yours is always Bo.
Grand or unusual names might become a little more wearable.
Maximilian and Magdalena are mouthfuls. They’re long and traditional names that we all know … but might not immediately spell correctly.
Using a nickname – whether that’s Max or Miles, Meg or Leni – can help make such names feel more accessible.
What if you ARE the nickname type?
Parents sometimes reject names with lots of nicknames because they think they won’t ever shorten their child’s name.
But then they’re holding their sweet, cuddly newborn and finding that Holden is much too grand. Next thing you know, he’s Holdie instead. Or much as you love the name Riley, her slightly older sister can’t call her anything other than Ry-Ry.
What’s wrong with room to grow?
We buy our children’s winter coats with a little room, assuming they’re grow between November and March.
And so that adorable baby Charlie might benefit from having Charles in the back of the closet, ready for when he grows into it.
Names with lots of nicknames preserve your child’s choices.
We name strangers.
Maggie is like a mini skirt – attractive, but there’s not a lot of fabric to work with. But Margaret is a ball gown, with layers to parse: Greta, Margo, Margaret in full. Nickname-rich names offer the gift of easy reinvention.
Where do you stand on names with lots of nicknames?
NAMES WITH LOTS OF NICKNAMES: GIRLS
AMELIA
Amy, Mia, Minnie, Lia, and more
BEATRICE and BEATRIX
Bea, Bebe, Betty, Bix, Trixie, and more
CATHERINE and KATHERINE
Kat, Cate/Kate, Kit, Hettie, and more
ELEANOR and ELINOR
Ellie, Nell, Nola, Nora, and more
ELIZABETH
Betty, Betsy, Ellie, Elise, Liz, Liza, and more
MARGARET
Greta, Maggie, Maisie, Margot, Meg, Rhett, and more
PENELOPE
Lola, Nell, Penny, Poppy, and more
THEODORA
Dora, Dot, Tess, Thea, Thora, and more
VICTORIA
Vica, Vicky, Queenie, Ria, Tori, and more
NAMES WITH LOTS OF NICKNAMES: BOYS
ALEXANDER
Dex, Sasha, Xan, Xander, and more
CHARLES
Arlo, Charlie, Chase, Chuck, Huck, and more
CHRISTOPHER
Chris, Kit, Topher, and more
DOMINIC
Dom, Nick, Nico, and more
EDWARD
Ed, Eddie, Ned, Ward, and more
JAMES
Jamie, Jay, Jem, Jimmy, and more
JONATHAN
Jon, Jono, Nat, Nate, and more
NATHANIEL
Nat, Nate, Niel, Thane, and more
NICHOLAS
Cole, Nick, Nicky, Nico, and more
ROBERT
Beto, Bo, Bobby, Rob, and more
THEODORE
Ted, Teddy, Theo, and more
WILLIAM
Bill, Will, Wills, Wim, and more
MAKING UNCONVENTIONAL NICKNAMES STICK
But wait, you might say: how can I explain that my Charles is a Chase, or my Victoria answers to Queenie?
It takes some effort – and a willingness to speak up. In general, look for opportunities to use and emphasize – whether that’s in conversation or by personally backpacks and other gear. Be willing to gently remind those in your life who need to know – and to ignore situations where it’s less important. And it can help to announce both your child’s name and preferred nickname at birth.
For more tips, check out this article.
Do you like name with lots of nicknames? Which ones are your favorites?
Originally published on August 13, 2013, this post was revised and re-published on October 16, 2021.
What do you think about using the formal name Juliana (Juli-ah-na) even if we plan on calling our daughter Annie? My husband says it’s not intuitive, but I don’t see much difference between an Elizabeth being a Libby, for example, which isn’t strange to me. The problem is I love both names (Juliana and Annie), but I worry that Annie sounds too little-girlish for an entire lifetime. Would love to hear your feedback!
I’ve got a Victor and a Francisco at my house and we use Vic maybe 25% of the time for Victor and V another 25%. Francisco is Frankie 95% of the time! I love that they have some choices within the name I gave them, names they can dial up or down in formality depending on their own preferences throughout their lives. And I get a little thrill when I see their full formal names written out (Victor David and Francisco Martin) – big names for little guys.
I adore this post, and I’m completely and utterly convinced you’re right. Would you consider creating a list of nickname-rich names that you like?
Yes, I should! Adding it to my (long + ever-growing) list!
We love the name Mila for a little girl. We really don’t like Mimi, though. It’s what my mother in law goes by with the grandchildren and we aren’t exactly close. As much as I love Mila in it’s full form, can you think of any other nicknames for it besides Mimi? I feel like if there’s a different option, perhaps she/her friends/teachers/etc would be more likely to stay away from Mimi.
Do you want a nickname at all? It’s MUCH less common for kids to have nicknames today, and Mila just plain doesn’t need one. Your other option is to choose a longer Mil- name – Milena, Millicent – and use Mila as a nickname. But my best guess is that if you named your daughter Mila, she’d never be anything other than Mila. Well, YOU can call her Pumpkin or Honey or Blueberry, but I doubt her teachers would! 🙂
That’s very comforting to hear. As we still try to decide a name, nicknames have been a reason to avoid certain ones. Mila has been a long time favorite, but we were worried about Mimi. We love Elaina and Eliana (the meaning, the sounds, the fact that they have an E like our son Everett) and we like the potential nickname Ellie. But we also wanted to honor my mom in some way (her name is Geraldine and she even requested to not give that name to a baby! And we decided the middle name will be after my husband’s grandma – Mary/Maria) We like Calla (Calla lillies being the flowers she carried in her wedding, and a symbol for Virgin Mary whom my mom prays to daily), but not Callie. And we like Scarlett (my mom’s birthstone is a ruby and my husband likes this better than Ruby), but don’t like the potential nicknames Scar or Carly. Of course we need to narrow our name choices down period, but frustrating to have so many we love and not like possible nicknames. So, it’s very good to know nicknames are not as common today! THANK YOU!
I tried very, very hard to think through all potential nicknames and avoid any names that had nicknames I didn’t like. My daughter’s name, Emeline, was a huge concern for me because I think Emmy sounds . . . less smart. Fortunately, she hasn’t ever had her name shortened (yet). I realize that at some point you lose control of the nn battle–especially if your child plays sports (my baby brother went from Ethan to Puma in a baffling turn-of-events and now wants to name his firstborn son Puma, after himself). Until that happens, though, I stress to all and sundry that my children’s names are not to be shortened. Am I uptight? A little bit. I mean, my Oskar would make the cutest Ozzie in the world, but the name Oskar is so perfect that why would I want something else used instead??
DH, my 2 daughters, and I all have names that don’t lend themselves to diminutives. It wasn’t planned, it just happened that way. I’m the only one (in the extended family, actually) that doesn’t have a slew of nicknames.
My only thought to add to this debate is, in these days of computerized everything, if you chose to call your child something not related to his/her first name, whether it’s a nn, a mn, or something else, be prepared to be gracious when schools, the DMV, etc., insist on using his/her proper first name on everything, and teach your child his/her proper first name, even if you don’t use it.
A very nice point. Clio knows her full name, but I was VERY nervous when we flew at that one particular age. She was just barely old enough to hold her own boarding pass and say her name if they ask – which, admittedly, they don’t always do. She got through it like a champ, but I did wonder what would happen if she just … didn’t.
Something that makes me insane: when we go to Disney World, everyone calls me Amy. It’s a crazy expensive family vacation, and they go to all of this trouble to do all of these little things right – but they’ve never thought to add a database field asking what their guests want to be called. My dentist, my bank – I do not expect them to remember that I prefer my middle name. But the imagineers at Disney? I feel like they should’ve thought about this one … Surely other people have a similar reaction.
I’m a Kathryn/Katy! I also thought I would start using Kate at some point but it never happened. I guess I will be Katy when I’m 85:)
#8 is very true for my family! As a fourth-generation Kathryn/Katherine (both spelling have been used, strangely), it’s nice that each of us got our own nickname: Kate, Kay, Kathy, Katy.
It’s one of the things I love about names like this – you can share something, and still have your own space, too.
Having been Katherine called Katie my entire life, I don’t really feel a connection to the more formal Katherine. When I was younger I thought when I got older I might like to be called a more “grown up” sounding Kate, I tried to change it in college but it didn’t stick. Katie has always been my name and it seems it always will, at least until the day I’m called Mom.
My own naming style tends to shy away from the more formal nickname-rich names and jumps straight to the nickname. I prefer Andie over Alexandra and Rand over Randall.
My son was named after a TV character’s last name and has an initial only for a first name
My sister and sister in law decided to call him by his middle initial like the character’s first name long before he was here. After he was born he has been called that once. Often he is “his first name-man” due his size. To my husband he’s “buddy” and me he is “lovey” or “lovey Lou”. He responds to lovey more than his given name.
My husband and I named our baby son a long, formal name similar to William. We correct people who call him Will or Billy. However, we call him Bubbers almost exclusively in every day life. He doesn’t know his real name. 🙂