Name Help is a series at Appellation Mountain. Every week, one reader’s name questions will be discussed. We’re relying on thoughtful comments from the community to help expectant parents narrow down their name decisions. Thank you in advance for sharing your insight!
THEY LOVE SIMPLE, TIMELESS NAMES
Kacie writes:
I’ve always disliked my name. It’s trendy and cute and you can guess my age within a few years. So when my husband and I welcomed our daughter I wanted a name that was classic, simple, strong.
Our list was Anne, Kate, and Rose, and we thought she looked most like an Anne.
We are now expecting our second child. If it was a girl, we had pretty much agreed on Rose. But it’s a boy, and it feels harder to find a name that meets our criteria.
Our list so far:
- James, but we have a long, hyphenated last name that starts and ends with S. (Something like Simpson-Thomas.) I think James is too hissy.
- John/Jack, but it’s the name shared by my stepfather/stepbrother and it would feel weird to use their family name, especially because I’m pretty sure Jack intends to use the name himself eventually.
- George, our current number one name, but that’s because it’s the only name we agree on. Still not sure if it’s “the one.”
- Ralph, my new secret favorite. My husband thinks it’s too old. I see what he means. But I keep coming back to Ralph. It makes me smile in a way George doesn’t.
CAN I USE THIS OLD MAN NAME FOR MY BABY?
Abby replies:
Congratulations on your second!
The question you’re asking, essentially, is can I use this old man name for my baby? It comes up a lot around here. I’m Team Grandpa Names. My take? Cedric and Edmund are only fusty antiques until we meet a sweet little boy with the name. They update instantly.
I can’t see why Ralph wouldn’t be the same.
My first thought with Ralph? Design Mom. Founded by the delightfully stylish Gabrielle Blair, the site is all about the intersection of design and motherhood. The Blair family’s firstborn is Ralph – now a fully fledged grown-up. If a couple so deliberately and thoughtfully stylish can name a son Ralph, it feels like the rest of us ought to be on board, too. (Their other kids: Maude, Oscar, Olive, Betty, Flora June.)
There’s Ralph Fiennes, of course. Except he pronounces his name like Rafe, which is quite suave and European.
But you’re thinking Ralph like the kid in The Christmas Story, right? A very midcentury Americana kind of vibe. Ralph peaked in the 1910s and stayed in the US Top 100 through the 1960s. It’s Ralph Kramden (Jackie Gleason’s character on The Honeymooners) and Ralph Malph (from Happy Days) though mostly now it’s Ralph Macchio, The Karate Kid now all grown up on Cobra Kai.
Ralph last charted in the US Top 1000 in 2018, but 167 boys still received the name in 2023. While it may not be popular, it’s also not forgotten or extinct by any means.
It’s a name that’s always there, approachable and down-to-earth. I have no problem making a case for dependable, easy-going Ralph and sweet Ralphie.
But let’s see if we can find some options that hit the mark between logical choice George and oh-I-love-this-Ralph.
One note: I’ve avoided a few names, like Glenn and Dean, that came to mind, mostly because I wonder if they’re too repetitive with Anne and that strong N sound?
A BROTHER FOR ANNE: SOMETHING LIKE RALPH
BRUCE
Ralph seems like a quiet name, but Bruce? Brief and complete, Bruce has plenty of swagger.
CLARK
There’s something gentle about Clark, but it checks all the same boxes as Ralph and George.
HUGH
The first name that came to mind as a Ralph substitute. Every bit as brief, complete, and traditional, but with a slightly more contemporary appeal.
JAY
I understand that Jack and John are out, but how about Jay?
MAX
Like Anne, this is a classic name that’s nicely compact.
NEIL
An Irish import and a hero name, thanks to astronaut Neil Armstrong.
PAUL
Undeniably classic, this New Testament choice sounds like the perfect brother name for Anne.
TROY
Maybe a little bit of an unusual choice, but Troy could work – it’s familiar, uncommon, and fits the brief-but-complete pattern, too.
From this list, Paul gets my vote. It’s handsome and timeless, but not quite as old school as Ralph.
But if Paul – or any of the other suggestions from me or the AM community – still feel off?
It’s time to start thinking of your son as Ralph. Because it if feels right, then proceed. Expect surprise and maybe even disbelief, just like any time a parent chooses a rare name.
But rest content in the knowledge that Ralph has stood the test of time – again and again – and will serve your son well.
What do you think of Ralph, readers? What would you suggest for Anne’s brother?
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I love your style. Some thoughts for you:
John
Peter
Blaise
Vincent
Luke
Mark
Hal
David
Nathan
Joel
Hi! I am chiming in again. I thought about a sibling for Anne a little more after reading others’ comments. I think Anne & Ralph don’t necessarily go together. I think “George” or a really traditional regal name would be the best fit…like Edward, Louis, Henry (I love Henry – I know it is so popular), William, etc. Maybe have a look at the British royal family for some name inspiration. I am sure you will find a great name, but I thought about the style issue again & I think the more classic & traditional, the better. Victor is a name that could work well with Anne, too, I think.
Three cheers for classic names! Anne is such a lovely one! I like Ralph. My top two associations are Ralph Vaughn Williams and Ralph Fiennes — both of whom use the “Rafe” pronunciation. I’d hesitate to pronounce it without checking for clarification. Whether that’s a downside for you or not is personal.
I’m mama to Joseph (sometimes called Joe), and our experience is that we regularly meet other Josephs of all generations and everyone knows how to say and spell it. If you’re open to a commonly-used name that is classic and simple and strong, I recommend it! Anne and Joseph. Anne and Joe.
Also, before you write off John/Jack, I’d gently challenge you that such a classic name can hardly belong to any one family or branch of family. Your stepfather and stepbrother have surely spent their lives encountering other men with their first name. If they have used or plan to use it for their own sons, this must not bother them too much. People who pick classic names expect to hear the name on other people. Your son will have a different surname than they do, and you can make sure he has a different middle name if you’re concerned about distinguishing during family gatherings. (I also know a John who goes by Jay, so if you like that, you can have both names for the price of one.) You are the expert on your family dynamics, but if you aren’t absolutely sure it would feel bad for them or for you, it’s worth at least checking in on their feelings. Maybe something like, “We love you and we love the name John. We hope you’d feel honored to share such a strong name with our son. And we hope that giving our son the name John/Jack wouldn’t discourage you from naming your own future son such a classic and historic name. Could you think about this for a few days and let us know how this sits with you?”
Congratulations on your little boy! You’re going to find a winner of a name for him.
Of course you can use Ralph and that sounds Lively, but I don’t think it’s the same vibe as Anne.
Anne makes me think of Jane Austen names.
With Anne, I like George on your list, but also:
Charles
Henry
Peter
William
John
Thomas
Edward
Michael
Robert
Philip
Paul
There’s an influencer and YouTuber called The Anna Edit who has a little boy she named Ralph. She doesn’t show him on the channel, except for when he was first born a few years ago. Thought I’d mention because like Abby said, it can help to see a baby with the “old man” name you like.
As the mother of a 3-year old named Harold, I say go for Ralph! Here’s my experience: There was some initial resistance from my immediate family, but gradually they accepted the decision and now that he’s here, the name is just their precious grandson. Occasionally I got an eyebrow raise from other people, but more often I got people gushing about how much they loved the old fashioned name. And my grandmother? She was only upset at the suggestion that we might use the nickname Harry. I’ll never forget her pleading, “Don’t call him Harry. Harold is so distinguished!” God bless that woman, I miss her. 🙂
Oh your grandmother sounds like the most amazing woman! And I’m glad Harold has worn well. My son had a friend named Harold; when I first met him, I did a double take, but same thing – you get used to hearing it on a little boy, and it’s just Not an Old Man Name At All Anymore, right?! Thanks for sharing your experience!
I’m a Ralph fan. But it does err fusty not classic.
I’d like to suggest Will! Just Will. Anne and Will feel lovely together.
Otherwise:
Scott
Isaac (seconding)
Simon (seconding)
Jay is an interesting stand-in for John or Jack, if you think of it Great Gatsby. How about Jasper? I do know it’s used more these days, but it has roots and it’s not top 10.
Oh I love love love Abby’s suggestion of Jay! It’s such a handsome underused choice! Similar to James but eliminates the hissy S sound issue with the last name. I think Clark is smashing as well
Some other ideas:
I wanted to suggest Grant as an alternative to George but perhaps Anne and Grant are too similar in sound. I wanted to suggest Ross in exchange for Ralph but I think it would be too hissy with the last names much like James. Same with Lewis! Bummer!
Instead of Ralph how about…
Raymond/Ray, Alfred/Alfie/Freddie, Roy, Frank
Instead of George how about…
Lawrence, Joseph, Peter, Henry, Frederick, William
Here are some other names that are classic but maybe a bit less “old man” for your husband’s liking:
Colin, Simon, Isaac, Michael, Zachary, Daniel, David, Calvin, Wesley, Patrick, Philip, Nicholas, Elliot, Lucas
I’m really inclined to push for Michael. I can’t remember the last time I’ve met a little Michael and so many kids nowadays go by their full names instead of the shortened version that I don’t think you’d have to worry about him being called Mike. I’m pretty sure that last little Michael I did meet was in fact Michael, not Mike.
Anne and Michael sound right as siblings
William and Peter feel like appropriate names with Anne. Or what about Philip, nn Pip? Anne and Philip… Anne (Annie,?) and Pip. Not quite George level popularity but quite dashing nonetheless. Christopher nn Kit also sounds nice with Anne.
I love James, Jack, George, and Ralph! You don’t say why your husband isn’t on board with Ralph so maybe that’s off the table. George seems to be the name to beat. Hugh and Clark are my favorites from Abby’s suggestions. What about Calvin, Blake, Gus, Walt, or Reid?
I think Ralph is great! I also like Troy from Abby’s suggestions because it is uncommon, but familiar, easy-to-pronounce, etc. I also thought of these names: Rafe (mostly used in England – form of Ralph), Webb, Floyd, Clyde, Hart (I particularly like this one!), Lane, Wade, Cole, Reid, Hayes (too trendy?), Rhett, Heath, and Dean. You will find something that fits your little one and I know what you are saying about names dating us – it is nice to have a name where people don’t immediately know which generation you’re a part of!