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Name Help: Our Girl List Feels Wrong

December 21, 2018 By appellationmountain 24 Comments

Name Help: A Sister for Max, Henry, and AbelUpdate from Jaime: Thanks for all of the suggestions! She was almost Vera, because we love the meaning. I liked Sylvie, too, but my husband said no. And then he read the comment about Ivy being IV. Not only is she our fourth child, but she was born on January 4th. At first I thought it might be cheesy, but my husband talked me into it, and now I love our little Ivy Eleanor’s name.

Jaime writes:

We have three sweet boys: Maxwell “Max,” Henry, and Abel. We had a long list of boys’ names for Max, and we’ve been mostly choosing from it ever since. Though Abel was my favorite years ago, and it took my husband a long time to come around to it!

Now we’re expecting our fourth, and probably final, child. We thought it would be a boy, because, what else?! But it’s a girl!

I still have my list of girl names from Max, but none of them seem right. Abigail is out because of Abel, and I think Hazel is, too. I just don’t like the sound of the other names on our list: Violet, Lucy, Evelyn, Adeline, and Nora. Or I still like them, but maybe not enough to use them.

So we’re pretty much starting over from scratch, and would love some new ideas. I don’t think popularity bothers me. We know another Max, and a bunch of Henrys.

Our last name starts with an J and sends with a -son.

Please read on for my response, and leave your thoughtful suggestions in the comments.

Dear Jaime –

Congratulations on your new daughter!

What you’re experiencing is pretty normal. Our tastes change. Now, if you’d had a daughter and named her Lucy or Violet, I’m sure you’d still love her name. Because it becomes all wrapped up in loving your child and the person she becomes, right?

But when a name is just a vague possibility, and we sit with it for a while, well … sometimes we love it more over time. (Sounds like that’s what happened with Abel!) And sometimes it just starts to feel like the moment has passed.

Lots of parents tell me that they start fresh with every pregnancy, as if their almost-names belong to that child, even if they weren’t ultimately chosen.

Since you’ve been considering this list for at least a few years, let’s put it aside and begin with some new possibilities.

Would you consider:

Edith – Abigail and Adeline have both become very popular, which always sends me scurrying to find similar-but-different choices. Traditional Edith, with sweet nickname Edie, seems like one option. Or maybe you’d like Biblical place name Eden? Read more about Edith here.

Eliza – Evelyn and Hazel make me think of Eliza. Also, I think a three-syllable first name might work well with your surname. Eliza can shorten to Ellie and Elle, but most girls I know answer to Eliza in full. Read more about Eliza here.

Genevieve – Evelyn and Violet both have such a strong ‘v’ sound. Would you like something similar, like Genevieve. Or maybe even Ivy? Read more about Genevieve.

Iris – Max, Henry, and Abel are short and sweet names, big on style, but still pretty straightforward. Iris seems like a feminine equivalent. Read more about Iris here.

Margot – Margot’s bright ‘o’ ending makes this traditional Margaret nickname feel light and modern. Read more about Margot here.

Thea – If you love Nora, but feel like it’s not for you anymore, might you like Thea? It could be short for Theodora or Dorothea or the like, but it stands well on its own. Read more about Thea here.

Vera – On a similar note, Vera strikes me as a Nora-Thea cousin, a two-syllable, ends-with-a girl’s name. Plus, it has that appealing V sound. Read more about Vera here.

Willa – Willa strikes me as a homespun name, simple but stylish. I like it a lot with your boys’ names, traditional but not too common. Read more about Willa here.

I’m struggling to choose a favorite because, really, it seems like you still have so many good options. I like Vera quite a bit, and it does seem to pick up on some sounds that you really like. It’s sort of like a Nora-Evelyn-Violet crossover. And I think Max, Henry, Abel, and Vera are great together!

But I can’t wait to open this one up to the community, because I know there will be plenty of amazing suggestions.

Readers, what would you name a sister for Max, Henry, and Abel?

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Comments

  1. Renée says

    January 30, 2019 at 1:52 PM

    Woo! That was me! Love it when a beautiful name can also be a symbol. Ivy the fourth is perfect, even moreso when her birthday is the 4th. (And not everyone or anyone will ever put those things together, so it’s still subtle and special.)

    Congratulations – such a beautiful combo.

    Reply
  2. Suzanne says

    December 26, 2018 at 10:01 PM

    Max, Henry, Abel, and…

    Eliza
    Natalie
    Juliet
    Caroline
    Charlotte
    Clara/Claire
    Cora
    Emmeline
    Emma
    Ella
    Grace
    Leah
    Lydia
    Katherine
    Kate
    Rosalie
    Victoria
    Juliana

    Reply
  3. CM says

    December 23, 2018 at 6:23 PM

    So many good suggestions here but I have a bias for Eleanor!!!

    We have a Henry, Eleanor and expecting baby 3 that might be a Maxwell.

    Hank, Ella & Max 🙂

    Reply
  4. Jaime says

    December 23, 2018 at 11:12 AM

    I would avoid another M, H or A name (even though I adore Margot). From Abby’s list, I love Edith, nn Edie. Edie was almost our daughter Faye’s name.

    A few other suggestions:

    Lydia
    Daphne
    Sybil (love the nn Sybi)
    Vera or Vada

    Reply
  5. Keats says

    December 23, 2018 at 3:00 AM

    Love Edith (“Edie”)! Also think Laurel may appeal to the same space as Violet while Elizabeth (nn Betsy) could fill the void of perhaps Adeline and Lucy at the see time.

    Both Betsy and Laurel share letters in common with the siblings. To me, having common letters always helps the names hang together a bit better. It is like the names have the same DNA too. Plus Elizabeth has the same Old Testament roots as Abel. Betsy and Laurel both seem traditionally feminine yet self-possessed, recognizable with a pleasant dose of retro.

    I met a 2 year old Betsy the other day and thought it suited her so perfectly. I’ll admit, I wouldn’t have picked Betsy from a name book before, but it wore so well in real life. It was refreshing and endearing.

    Max, Henry, Abel and Betsy.

    Reply
  6. Marisa says

    December 22, 2018 at 9:24 PM

    What about Rosaline/Rosalind “Roz”? It’s turn-of-the-century romantic but with a short and spunky nickname that fits with her brothers.

    Reply
  7. Michelle F says

    December 22, 2018 at 8:56 PM

    Susannah or Fiona

    Reply
  8. Andrea says

    December 22, 2018 at 11:56 AM

    Beatrix, Daphne, Elinor, Evangeline, Felicity, Garnet, Laura, Louisa, Maeve, Marguerite, Mary, Matilda, Olive, Thea, Virginia, Viveca.

    Reply
  9. Christina Fonseca says

    December 22, 2018 at 10:06 AM

    Lydia seems like a natural fit with Max, Henry, and Abel and sounds good with J-son

    Reply
  10. A. Waguespack says

    December 21, 2018 at 11:53 PM

    I like Simone with this sib set. Max, Henry, Abel and Simone. Classic and feminine but capable of holding her own in the boys club. Congratulations!

    Reply
  11. Jean C. says

    December 21, 2018 at 8:38 PM

    Wow, Edith sounds so nice with the brothers names.
    I also like the suggestions of Ruby and Eloise. Maybe Evangeline? Matilda? Cecilia? Grace?

    Reply
  12. Erin Beth says

    December 21, 2018 at 7:33 PM

    Lots of great suggestions. I’d add:
    Florence
    Frances
    Celia
    Sylvie

    Reply
  13. Em says

    December 21, 2018 at 6:30 PM

    Here are some other ideas

    Aurora
    Lydia
    Alice
    Beatrice
    Audrey

    Reply
  14. Em says

    December 21, 2018 at 5:05 PM

    My suggestions have already been mentioned…
    Emmeline
    Ruby

    Reply
  15. The Mrs. says

    December 21, 2018 at 5:03 PM

    Estelle gives you history and elegance in one. She comes with sassy and strong nickname Stella.
    Max, Henry Abel, and Estelle.

    Or maybe peaceful Irene feels right in a household of three older brothers.
    Max, Henry, Abel, and Irene.

    Flora might strike the sweet balance between well-known and underused. She’s dignified but cool, endearing but classic.
    Max, Henry, Abel, and Flora.

    Congrats and best wishes on your daughter!

    Reply
  16. Amy3 says

    December 21, 2018 at 4:16 PM

    Edith, Vera, and Iris are my favorites. I’d love to add Margot, but it might be the repeating initial is a deal breaker.

    Reply
  17. Marie says

    December 21, 2018 at 2:29 PM

    I really love Nora and Violet from your list. I think with having three boys then a girl having maybe a spunky name as one poster mentioned may feel right. I love the name Margot and love the o ending. I also like Ivy from the post.

    My name to add? Jane

    Reply
  18. Renée says

    December 21, 2018 at 2:08 PM

    Eleanor
    Juliette (sharing a J like you Jaime)
    Emmeline
    Tessa
    Penny
    Eloise
    Caroline

    Vera is my favorite from Abby’s list. 🙂

    Congrats on a baby girl!! 🙂

    Reply
  19. Emma says

    December 21, 2018 at 12:16 PM

    Of the previous suggestions, I love Iris the most! It sounds so perfect with the boys’ names. But I also think Edith, Clara, Rose, and Cora would fit well. Margot, too, if you don’t mind her sharing a first initial with Max.

    Ruby
    Daisy
    Isla
    Eva
    Sadie
    June
    Cecily
    Lena
    Elsie

    I’d add Alice and Molly, too, if, again, you don’t mind repeating initials.

    Reply
  20. Renée says

    December 21, 2018 at 10:37 AM

    Ooh. Ivy = IV! Perfect! Although, I’d tend to even out the endings in your set (and not repeat initials) and go with an -a ending. Love Willa!

    Cora
    Gemma
    Viola
    Lyla
    Fiona
    Clara

    Reply
  21. Rms says

    December 21, 2018 at 10:00 AM

    I love ultra feminine and vintage with your boy combo. Love. And a cute short nickname for the longer choices!

    Elizabeth
    Emmeline
    Adelaide
    Susannah Zuzu?
    Wilhelmina Willa
    Charlotte
    Savannah
    Amelia
    Ophelia
    Miranda “Mira”
    Tallulah
    Magdalene/a
    Evangeline/a
    Luna
    Juniper
    Rose
    Grace
    Ivy
    Willow

    Reply
  22. CarolAnn says

    December 21, 2018 at 9:11 AM

    Margot really jumped out at me. Love it with Max, Henry and Abel. It’s sweet, yet spunky. Although it shares a letter with Max, it kind of completes the names coming full circle M to M.

    Reply
  23. Taylor says

    December 21, 2018 at 8:59 AM

    Lila/Lilah?

    Reply
  24. Julie G says

    December 21, 2018 at 8:01 AM

    Emmeline

    Reply

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