We’re relying on thoughtful comments from the community to help expectant parents narrow down their name decisions. Thank you in advance for sharing your insight!
Help! Our twin sons are due in July, but will probably be here sooner. After weeks (AND WEEKS) of discussion, we both came up with one favorite name.
We each started out with a list of 20-ish choices. The other person got to cross off any they really couldn’t live with or would only be okay with as a middle. And then we went back and chose our personal favorite.
The end result:
EZRA JORDAN and ETHAN JAMES
Done, right? Nope.
Now I’m having doubts.
Do the names even go together? And it is wrong to love one name so much, but find the other just kind of blah – and worry that our son will think it shows less care, because it is much more common? Plus, Jordan is a family name and James is just a name my husband thought sounded good in the middle.
And it is too much to have two names with the same initials? We didn’t plan it that way at all.
If it matters, these are almost certainly going to be our only children. (We also have a German shepherd named Oliver, which used to be my favorite name for a son.)
Please read on for my response and leave your thoughtful suggestions in the comments.
I honestly think these names are perfect for your sons.
You did work together!
Maybe you each arrived at your final choice independently. But the process of evaluating was a team effort.
The names seem very compatible.
It’s only natural that the name you love seems far more special to your ear. But I’m guessing the opposite is true for your husband?
From an outsider’s perspective, Ethan and Ezra both share Hebrew roots. They’re strong, distinctive sounds. Ethan has been very popular for a much longer stretch of time. However, Ezra, too, ranks in the current US Top 100. To peers in their generation, the names are very much a matched set.
With two children, shared initials seem like coincidence.
I think I understand how you’re feeling about shared initials. They’re already twins, with a shared birthday and so much more. Repeating the same first and middle initial – identical monograms! – can be a lot.
But is it worth tweaking your two truly favorite names to arrive at something just a little different? It seems like that would violate the spirit of the process you’ve followed so far. Particularly because I imagine you’d want your husband to give up his favorite name … and vice versa.
That said, maybe you should experiment …
The way to test this isn’t necessarily to read what a bunch of people on the internet think. (Though I hope this is helpful.)
Instead, I’d try experimenting with some slight differences. Do they make the names more appealing? Less?
What if you used Ezra James and Ethan Jordan?
The rhythm of Ethan Jordan isn’t ideal, but maybe that matters less.
Or maybe there is a family middle for Ethan – possibly without a J – so both boys’ middle names carry equal significance?
And, of course, it’s possible that your husband’s second favorite name would be a better match with Ezra Jordan. Or that your second favorite goes better with Ethan James. It’s worth considering those runner-ups, if only because they can easily offer you a sense of what it might be like to not repeat initials. (Though I’m not clear if you both have definite runner-ups?)
Are you willing to move down your list to a slightly less preferred name in order to achieve a perfect pairing?
My instinct is that you’ve found your sons’ names! But a little bit of experimenting can help you know if that’s true … or if one of the other alternatives you consider is really better.