Name Help is a series at Appellation Mountain. Every Saturday, one reader’s name questions will be discussed.
We’re relying on thoughtful comments from the community to help expectant parents narrow down their name decisions. Thank you in advance for sharing your insight!
Sofia writes:
I have a baby girl due in July. I have four boys already, so this is an exciting time! I finally get to name a girl. Now that it is a reality, i think naming my boys was so much easier.
My husband gave my full permission to name our girl which is so exciting!! H@yes is the last name.
Here are my boys:
Felix James H@yes
Theodore Henry H@yes
Julian Jack H@yes
Sawyer Alexander H@yes
Potential girl names:
Ophelia Moon – This is my number one. I have been obsessed with this name since I was a little girl. The only draw back is the whole Ophelia being a tragic heroine in Hamlet. I think the name is romantic, and the truth is i don’t think many kids know about Hamlet. 🙂 By the time they do, Ophelia will be old enough to not really care. Any other middle name suggestions?
Uma Rose– I think this name sounds so beautiful.
Lucia– I love the meaning
Lula
Anouk – I worry that it is too harsh sounding, but I think it is beautiful.
Anais – I have also been obsessed with this name forever but I feel like it would forever be a spelling and pronunciation problem.
Fleur
Marigold– I think its pretty, and Goldie as a nickname is so cute!
Fiona – I think this is a sweet name.
Read on for my response, and please add your thoughtful suggestions in the comments.
Hi Sofia –
Congratulations on your first girl!
Since you’re not asking for new suggestions, I’m not going to add to your list – you’ve got great possibilities already!
It seems like one of your big questions is whether Ophelia would be a burdensome name for a daughter. I don’t think so; in fact, I’ve been watching Ophelia recently. It was more commonly used in the past, and there are plenty of reasons to think that the tragic fate on Hamlet’s Ophelia doesn’t make the name unwearable in 2016. But let’s have a poll, because I’d love to get a broader range of opinions on this one:
I’m curious to see the outcome of the poll, but even without seeing the results, I think it’s a great choice. First, it’s been your longtime favorite – and you’ve been naming babies for a while! Second, it fits with Felix, Theodore, Julian, and Sawyer – gently old-fashioned, a little bit literary and romantic.
If you’re still on the fence, one thought is to choose a more conventional middle name. I like Ophelia Moon – okay, I love it! – but Moon is a bolder middle name choice than you’ve made before. (Sidenote: there is a moon of Uranus called Ophelia.) James, Henry, Jack, and Alexander are all pretty traditional middles – fallback names, if you will. Something like Ophelia Mae, Ophelia Louise, or Ophelia Jane might be a safer choice. And, of course, Ophelia Rose is an obvious choice since you already have Rose on your list.
Just in case my cheerleading for Ophelia hasn’t convinced you, let’s take a look at the other possibilities.
Fiona and Lucia strike me as safer, more conventional options. Fiona and Lucia were both in the US Top 250 in 2014 – not super popular choices, but the kind of names that you’ll hear from time to time. I think they’re lovely choices for a daughter that hit that sweet spot: familiar, but not too common.
Anouk, Anais, and even Fleur are gorgeous name, but I agree with your assessment – they can be tough to pronounce and spell for native English speakers. Some parents shrug this off; others find it frustrating. You have to love the name enough to overlook the occasional headaches.
Marigold, Lula, and Uma are all great names, but they’re all pretty rare. In other words, they’re not any more mainstream than Ophelia, and so I wouldn’t trade your favorite for one of these three names, thinking they’d be easier to wear. (Though I suspect Marigold is going to get a nice little bump from the Downton Abbey storyline involving Edith’s secret daughter.)
Oh wait – I said I wouldn’t add any more names to your list, but Marigold and Ophelia make me think of Magnolia. It’s a gorgeous garden name (like Fleur and Marigold), but shares the -lia ending of so many lovely names for girls – including Ophelia.
And yet, overall I think you should stick with your favorite name, and the only question is whether to keep your bold middle name choice, or opt for something more conventional. If you hesitate to use Ophelia, I think a more conventional middle name like Rose might be a reassuring choice. But if I’ve talked you into using Ophelia without reservation, then by all means, go with Ophelia Moon!
What would you suggest to Sofia? Is Ophelia Moon the right choice, Ophelia Rose, or is there another name you think the family should consider for their first girl?
I would totally go with Ophelia Moon
Also, any interest in Oona? Much like Uma, but without the obvious Uma Thurman association.
I love the name! Go with it! It is beautiful and sounds beautiful to say out loud. You are an awesome namer… just look at your boy’s names! One of my co-workers named her fifth child (fourth daughter) Ophelia Madelyn just last year. It wears well on a toddler these days, and her mama says she gets only compliments on it.
I hate to rain on the Ophelia parade, because I adore it in theory and on paper. But for those without the Shakespeare association, “feel ya” might aurally stand out when they first hear it.
Does Portia interest you? Similarly Shakespearean, and feels like a fresher alternative to Phoebe (though to the ear it does carry the “Porsche” association).
Lucia concerns me because of the three different pronunciations. A friend of mine has a Loo-SEE-uh who constantly gets “Loosha” or “Lu-CHEE-uh.” Clearing it up all the time seems like a chore for a kid. To that end, I just left my local YMCA. A family was checking in at the front desk. The employee looked at her computer screen and referred to the little girl as Alyssa. The little girl, maybe five, turned to her mom and whined “It’s A-LEE-suh. WHY DO PEOPLE ALWAYS DO THAT?”
An Instagram AM post comment brought up another question – does Felx go by Fee? O-Fee-Lee-uh might get Fee too, especially as a TV show (Royals) right now is using Ophelia nn Fee. Is Felix + Ophelia too much? On the upside (?) the TV show might boost the name making it more familiar, if you’re determined it’s the one.
Felix has always been felix. i have even managed to never nickname theodore. the only nickname for my boys is Julian who we call “juju”.
I love love love the name Ophelia Moon. You have fabulous taste. However, I do think that as a previous poster stated, you should consider whether you would be comfortable having the name yourself. Do the Starbucks test and see how you feel! I think Ophelia Rose, or even Rose Ophelia, would both be beautiful options! Moon as a middle name is also so awesome. My next favourite choice for you would be Fiona Moon.
Would you want your name to be Ophelia? I’d challenge you to use it introducing yourself for a day, or do the Starbucks test a few times. That way you’ll get a real world sense of how well-known and received it is. Plus you’ll feel it better on your tongue. I agree it’s not the most pleasant sound, standing alone from its association to Shakespeare. It brings to mind the -philias to me.
Also, it strikes me that you’ve chosen great (!) names for your boys. All sound fabulous, are familiar without being overused (yet) and have a touch of whimsy that adds to, rather than overshadows the name. That simply isn’t the case with Ophelia. The fact that your husband is silent on the choice makes me wonder if a daughter doesn’t need the same careful consideration?
I think Ophelia would make an interesting choice for a middle, that she wouldn’t be burdened with using each day. Sorry if I seem to be hating on Ophelia – I actually love the name as part of Shakespeare. Everything I’ve said so far (beyond the association to Shakespeare) applies to your other choices as well, except Fiona and Lucia.
Lucia would be my vote for you. Fits well with the brothers. Stands well alone. Will take her through any situation and age. Beautiful sound – regardless of which pronounciation you choose. Familiar yet not overused. Fiona is also great, but why repeat an initial if you don’t have to.
It must be difficult after contemplating boy names for so long! And exciting. Enjoy the process, don’t rush it. You’re not only naming an only daughter and your fifth child. You’re naming an adult who will live outside of her family for more years than with. And yes, the pressure of only choosing one name! Good luck!
Lucia is beautiful but i worry about wrong pronunciation. oddly enough being a Sofia in the 80’s and 90’s before it was super popular was an issue. people would always say SYLVIA. and it drove me crazy.
It’s not Hamlet’s Ophelia that gives me pause, but the well-known parenting book to prevent suicide in teenage girls and about middle school girl group dynamics, Reviving Ophelia. I could see that book and concept being out on many a classmate’s coffee table at home in the tween years which could be problematic for your Ophelia.
All your other name choices are lovely. For close partners of Ophelia in sound and romance: Oona, Philippa, Ottavia, Philomena, Odette, Odille, Aurelia.
I am Australian not American but wanted to comment. I have a Shakespeare inspired surname (think MacBeth) and I am shocked at the low level of Shakespearean knowledge in the general population! Many people may not know that Ophelia is from Hamlet and some of those who do will not know the story well enough to know of her terrible end. I suspect those who do know of the details will be more understanding of the literature reference. My hesitation isn’t so much about the tragedy but the sound of Ophelia and the risk of I feel ya teasing.
From your list I love Fleur and wouldn’t expect spelling or pronounciation problems. I had Lucia on my list but hesitated about how people would say it (Loo-see-uh, Loo-sha, Loo-chee-a).
I do love your taste in names. Have you considered Phoebe or Bianca?
Ophelia Moon all the way. You could even break your naming trend and give her two middle names Ophelia Rose Moon. But I think your long time favourite is absolutely lovely and perfect!