Name Help is a series at Appellation Mountain. Every Saturday, one reader’s name questions will be discussed.
We’re relying on thoughtful comments from the community to help expectant parents narrow down their name decisions. Thank you in advance for sharing your insight!
Sofia writes:
I have a baby girl due in July. I have four boys already, so this is an exciting time! I finally get to name a girl. Now that it is a reality, i think naming my boys was so much easier.
My husband gave my full permission to name our girl which is so exciting!! H@yes is the last name.
Here are my boys:
Felix James H@yes
Theodore Henry H@yes
Julian Jack H@yes
Sawyer Alexander H@yes
Potential girl names:
Ophelia Moon – This is my number one. I have been obsessed with this name since I was a little girl. The only draw back is the whole Ophelia being a tragic heroine in Hamlet. I think the name is romantic, and the truth is i don’t think many kids know about Hamlet. 🙂  By the time they do, Ophelia will be old enough to not really care. Any other middle name suggestions?
Uma Rose– I think this name sounds so beautiful.
Lucia– I love the meaning
Lula
Anouk – I worry that it is too harsh sounding, but I think it is beautiful.
Anais – I have also been obsessed with this name forever but I feel like it would forever be a spelling and pronunciation problem.
Fleur
Marigold– I think its pretty, and Goldie as a nickname is so cute!
Fiona – I think this is a sweet name.
Read on for my response, and please add your thoughtful suggestions in the comments.
Hi Sofia –
Congratulations on your first girl!
Since you’re not asking for new suggestions, I’m not going to add to your list – you’ve got great possibilities already!
It seems like one of your big questions is whether Ophelia would be a burdensome name for a daughter. I don’t think so; in fact, I’ve been watching Ophelia recently. It was more commonly used in the past, and there are plenty of reasons to think that the tragic fate on Hamlet’s Ophelia doesn’t make the name unwearable in 2016. But let’s have a poll, because I’d love to get a broader range of opinions on this one:
I’m curious to see the outcome of the poll, but even without seeing the results, I think it’s a great choice. First, it’s been your longtime favorite – and you’ve been naming babies for a while! Second, it fits with Felix, Theodore, Julian, and Sawyer – gently old-fashioned, a little bit literary and romantic.
If you’re still on the fence, one thought is to choose a more conventional middle name. I like Ophelia Moon – okay, I love it! – but Moon is a bolder middle name choice than you’ve made before. (Sidenote: there is a moon of Uranus called Ophelia.) James, Henry, Jack, and Alexander are all pretty traditional middles – fallback names, if you will. Something like Ophelia Mae, Ophelia Louise, or Ophelia Jane might be a safer choice. And, of course, Ophelia Rose is an obvious choice since you already have Rose on your list.
Just in case my cheerleading for Ophelia hasn’t convinced you, let’s take a look at the other possibilities.
Fiona and Lucia strike me as safer, more conventional options. Fiona and Lucia were both in the US Top 250 in 2014 – not super popular choices, but the kind of names that you’ll hear from time to time. I think they’re lovely choices for a daughter that hit that sweet spot: familiar, but not too common.
Anouk, Anais, and even Fleur are gorgeous name, but I agree with your assessment – they can be tough to pronounce and spell for native English speakers. Some parents shrug this off; others find it frustrating. You have to love the name enough to overlook the occasional headaches.
Marigold, Lula, and Uma are all great names, but they’re all pretty rare. In other words, they’re not any more mainstream than Ophelia, and so I wouldn’t trade your favorite for one of these three names, thinking they’d be easier to wear. (Though I suspect Marigold is going to get a nice little bump from the Downton Abbey storyline involving Edith’s secret daughter.)
Oh wait – I said I wouldn’t add any more names to your list, but Marigold and Ophelia make me think of Magnolia. It’s a gorgeous garden name (like Fleur and Marigold), but shares the -lia ending of so many lovely names for girls – including Ophelia.
And yet, overall I think you should stick with your favorite name, and the only question is whether to keep your bold middle name choice, or opt for something more conventional. If you hesitate to use Ophelia, I think a more conventional middle name like Rose might be a reassuring choice. But if I’ve talked you into using Ophelia without reservation, then by all means, go with Ophelia Moon!
What would you suggest to Sofia? Is Ophelia Moon the right choice, Ophelia Rose, or is there another name you think the family should consider for their first girl?Â
just wanted to write an update for anyone thinking about the name ophelia for their baby girl. i indeed ended up going with my heart and naming her Ophelia Moon. It has fit her since day one. Every time someone asks what her name is and i tell them Ophelia, i have yet to get anything but wow! that is a beautiful name. over and over again people tell me how sweet and beautiful it is. Not once has anyone mentioned Shakespeare. So if its in your heart go for it! i always feel so proud and happy calling her name in public places. She is 2.5 now and its so cute, because when people call her Ophelia, she corrects them and says with conviction no i am Ophelia Moon! 🙂 so far we haven’t nick named her and i like calling her Ophelia. Sometimes her brothers call her feelie which is sweet. Also sometimes my husband and i call her O when we are talking about her. mostly it has just been Ophelia or Ophelia Moon.
anyways still love it as much as i did when i was a little girl.
thank you for listening
wow i just saw this post, i hadn’t checked in a while to see if she had posted it yet. pregnant brain. thank you all so much for your feedback, it is so helpful. so i am still really really attached to Ophelia. some of you mentioned the “i feel ya” teasing. i am not so worried about that. my name is Sofia and in junior high everyone called me SOFA. “can i sit on you sofa” it was so stupid, but it never even made me feel bad, or upset. it was usually coming from boys that had a crush. hehe 🙂
about the middle name moon- before i got pregnant with my third boy, i had a very vivid dream about giving birth, and when the baby was born it was a boy and i named him moon. i was so moved by this dream and couldn’t stop thinking about the dream or the name forever. i obviously couldn’t name my third boy “moon” but because i never left me.. i figured why not give it to one of my children as a middle.
the reason my boys have more “traditional middle names” is because for me it feels important for a boy to have an option of something traditional. the names also just worked with the first names. for me i think naming girls in general has a tiny bit more flexibility in terms of being traditional or not. this is why i choose “moon” .
i love all the other suggestions for middles and have been giving so much thought to all of these names. recently i got obsessed with Marigold and started saying it out loud a lot, somehow it just doesn’t flow as well as ophelia to me.
about the starbucks test, i have been doing it for many years actually. i was always trying to call her in and manifest her. So i have been using her name for lots of things for years.
my main concern was the tragic association, so i am glad to hear many of you don’t find it that important.
anyways, thanks so much for all the suggestions. i said my husband is giving me full power to choose, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t have any say. i want him to have a say, and he tell me if he HATES or LOVES something. we got lucky bc we have the same taste. for the boys, i said the name He loved it and that was that. so i will go over all these suggestions with him.
I love Ophelia as well – wondering about nicknames though, what would you shorten that to? I find with my dog I end up using a one syllable shortened version, and a one syllable plus y. Thoughts?
i like the nickname fee, or lee lee
You have some beautiful options…congrats on your girl! I’ve found naming girls is so much fun 🙂
I love Marigold…still trying to convince my hubby to earmark it if we ever have another girl. I like Anais too, but as a middle so as to lessen the pronunciation issues.
I like Ophelia, but I wonder if you could find an alternative for the middle that is a name rather than a word. Luna, Diana/Artemis, Selena and Stella come to mind. I quite like Ophelia Rose though. The Shakespeare influence is really strong to me, but may not be for others. Here are some related names that are similar to Ophelia in my opinion, but a bit more “wearable”: Juliet, Aurora/Aurelia, Helena, Rosalind/Rosalie, Isadora, Evangeline
If you like Lula, I wonder if you would like Tallulah? Lovely meaning, and you can use Lulu, Lula or even Tallie as a nickname.
Fiona makes me think of Phoebe. Uma makes me think of Oona, which I prefer.
Okay, a few combos:
Felix James, Theodore Henry, Julian Jack, Sawyer Alexander and baby sister:
Tallulah Rose
Stella Juliet
Aurora Anais-Rose
Aurelia Marigold
Fiona Diane
Marigold Evangeline
Oona Rosalind
Felix, Theodore, Julian, Sawyer, and…
Cecily Luna
Junia Rose
Estelle Moon
Maisie Elune (full name of Marisol, Melody, etc.)
Thisbe June
Ariadne True
Cordelia Anouk
Delphine Sakura (nickname of Fee)
The sound of Ophelia Moon is like that of a lullabye, soothing and charming at the same time. Upon saying it aloud, “I feel your moon” is what I heard…which is tragic. Such beauty ought not to be subject to something so base. You are a superb namer, and I think you have all the right sounds going for you with this name, too. But perhaps a slight shift is the easiest way to make her life simpler.
Best wishes as you await your darling daughter’s arrival!
I hear Ophelie often here, it’s a French variant of Ophelia and it’s pronounced Oh-FAY-lee. It’s gorgeous and not as Hamlet-y.
Just tossing that out! 🙂
Ophelia Moon is sublime and I’d use it if I were you, but if Hamlet is an issue, think about variations?
My favorite aunt was Ofelia, pronounced O-FAY-lia, and I find that pronunciation beautiful too. Like others, my hesitation wouldn’t be the character (although she bugs me) but the pun possibilities, and the nicknames. My aunt was generally Fay, but sometimes she got called Oaf or Ofie, too.
Me, I loveFleur.
Ophelia Moon is gorgeous, and so is Ophelia Rose! However, I’m not crazy about the flow of Ophelia Moon H@yes nor Ophelia Rose H@yes especially. Rose Hayes sounds almost like rosé to me, as in the wine.
But if Ophelia Moon is what you really love, I’d go for it. I also like Ophelia Uma H@yes or Ophelia Oona H@yes. Or Ophelia Luna H@yes. Ophelia Lucille H@yes. Ok ill stop lol.
I really really love Oona for you though for some reason. Oona Marigold?
Ophelia Moon is gorgeous! I hope you use this one.
If you’re inclined to consider a more conventional middle, I like the suggestion of Ophelia Rose Moon. Gives her 2 fallbacks if she’s not into Ophelia – a daring one and a conventional one.
I wouldn’t worry overmuch about either Hamlet or teasing. I suspect the Hamlet reference would elude many (most?) people and “I feel ya” teasing is the type of thing that lasts a couple of years, if she experiences it at all. My daughter has an unusual name that’s easy to make fun of and successfully navigated elementary and middle school with it.
I love the names Ophelia and Moon, but not together. To me it sounds like: I feel your moon – moon being a bare bottom – as in mooing someone. I loved the other suggestion of Ophelia Rose Moon though 🙂
Love Ophelia. Not a great show by any means but “the royals” has a main character named Ophelia so perhaps it’s getting more mainstream. I think she sometimes got called Fee which is adorable. (She was a classic protagonist FYI)
Ophelia is gorgeous! You should definitely stick with it. But I also think you should go with a more conventional middle. Ophelia Rose is lovely. Or Ophelia Marigold!
I know it is a little more mainstream, but I have a Juliet and she rarely gets any Shakespeare comments. Actually, I had to clue her in because she heard her name in a few pop songs recently. I wouldn’t let Shakespeare stop you 🙂
First off, I love… no, ADORE your boys’ names!
As soon as I read the first item on your list, I was sold. Ophelia is beyond perfect with your sons’ names – a traditional, off-beat yet recognisable vintage choice with a long history and literary associations. It’s perfect! The rest of your list is lovely, but nothing fits as well as Ophelia for me.
Judging by your description, Ophelia is the name you’d use if you followed your heart alone. And the fact that you’ve loved the name since childhood is a good indication that you’ll never go off it or regret using it. Of course it’s important to use your head too when naming a real human being who has to live with the name, but honestly I don’t think either the Shakespeare thing or the “I feel ya” thing is an issue. If Ryder can work…
Personally, I love Ophelia Moon and would definitely go with that, but Abby has a point that your boys all have much more traditional middles. How much of a problem that is is up to you – for me, middle names are the place to be more flexible so I think it’s totally fine if they don’t all “match” stylistically. However, if you wanted something a little more traditional, could I suggest Ophelia Fleur? The sounds are a tiny bit repetitive but I actually find that sweet in this case, and the flow is lovely. Ophelia Jane or Rose or Mae would flow well but these lack the “wow” factor for me, I’m sorry. I just think that, having waited until your fifth child to finally name your girl, you need to go with something that wows you, rather than a “safer” compromise.
All the best of luck with the new arrival!
I instantly thought Luna. Beautiful sound, means “moon”, goes perfectly with the brothers.
I would totally go with Ophelia Moon
Also, any interest in Oona? Much like Uma, but without the obvious Uma Thurman association.
I love the name! Go with it! It is beautiful and sounds beautiful to say out loud. You are an awesome namer… just look at your boy’s names! One of my co-workers named her fifth child (fourth daughter) Ophelia Madelyn just last year. It wears well on a toddler these days, and her mama says she gets only compliments on it.
I hate to rain on the Ophelia parade, because I adore it in theory and on paper. But for those without the Shakespeare association, “feel ya” might aurally stand out when they first hear it.
Does Portia interest you? Similarly Shakespearean, and feels like a fresher alternative to Phoebe (though to the ear it does carry the “Porsche” association).
Lucia concerns me because of the three different pronunciations. A friend of mine has a Loo-SEE-uh who constantly gets “Loosha” or “Lu-CHEE-uh.” Clearing it up all the time seems like a chore for a kid. To that end, I just left my local YMCA. A family was checking in at the front desk. The employee looked at her computer screen and referred to the little girl as Alyssa. The little girl, maybe five, turned to her mom and whined “It’s A-LEE-suh. WHY DO PEOPLE ALWAYS DO THAT?”
An Instagram AM post comment brought up another question – does Felx go by Fee? O-Fee-Lee-uh might get Fee too, especially as a TV show (Royals) right now is using Ophelia nn Fee. Is Felix + Ophelia too much? On the upside (?) the TV show might boost the name making it more familiar, if you’re determined it’s the one.
Felix has always been felix. i have even managed to never nickname theodore. the only nickname for my boys is Julian who we call “juju”.
I love love love the name Ophelia Moon. You have fabulous taste. However, I do think that as a previous poster stated, you should consider whether you would be comfortable having the name yourself. Do the Starbucks test and see how you feel! I think Ophelia Rose, or even Rose Ophelia, would both be beautiful options! Moon as a middle name is also so awesome. My next favourite choice for you would be Fiona Moon.
Would you want your name to be Ophelia? I’d challenge you to use it introducing yourself for a day, or do the Starbucks test a few times. That way you’ll get a real world sense of how well-known and received it is. Plus you’ll feel it better on your tongue. I agree it’s not the most pleasant sound, standing alone from its association to Shakespeare. It brings to mind the -philias to me.
Also, it strikes me that you’ve chosen great (!) names for your boys. All sound fabulous, are familiar without being overused (yet) and have a touch of whimsy that adds to, rather than overshadows the name. That simply isn’t the case with Ophelia. The fact that your husband is silent on the choice makes me wonder if a daughter doesn’t need the same careful consideration?
I think Ophelia would make an interesting choice for a middle, that she wouldn’t be burdened with using each day. Sorry if I seem to be hating on Ophelia – I actually love the name as part of Shakespeare. Everything I’ve said so far (beyond the association to Shakespeare) applies to your other choices as well, except Fiona and Lucia.
Lucia would be my vote for you. Fits well with the brothers. Stands well alone. Will take her through any situation and age. Beautiful sound – regardless of which pronounciation you choose. Familiar yet not overused. Fiona is also great, but why repeat an initial if you don’t have to.
It must be difficult after contemplating boy names for so long! And exciting. Enjoy the process, don’t rush it. You’re not only naming an only daughter and your fifth child. You’re naming an adult who will live outside of her family for more years than with. And yes, the pressure of only choosing one name! Good luck!
Lucia is beautiful but i worry about wrong pronunciation. oddly enough being a Sofia in the 80’s and 90’s before it was super popular was an issue. people would always say SYLVIA. and it drove me crazy.
It’s not Hamlet’s Ophelia that gives me pause, but the well-known parenting book to prevent suicide in teenage girls and about middle school girl group dynamics, Reviving Ophelia. I could see that book and concept being out on many a classmate’s coffee table at home in the tween years which could be problematic for your Ophelia.
All your other name choices are lovely. For close partners of Ophelia in sound and romance: Oona, Philippa, Ottavia, Philomena, Odette, Odille, Aurelia.
I am Australian not American but wanted to comment. I have a Shakespeare inspired surname (think MacBeth) and I am shocked at the low level of Shakespearean knowledge in the general population! Many people may not know that Ophelia is from Hamlet and some of those who do will not know the story well enough to know of her terrible end. I suspect those who do know of the details will be more understanding of the literature reference. My hesitation isn’t so much about the tragedy but the sound of Ophelia and the risk of I feel ya teasing.
From your list I love Fleur and wouldn’t expect spelling or pronounciation problems. I had Lucia on my list but hesitated about how people would say it (Loo-see-uh, Loo-sha, Loo-chee-a).
I do love your taste in names. Have you considered Phoebe or Bianca?
Ophelia Moon all the way. You could even break your naming trend and give her two middle names Ophelia Rose Moon. But I think your long time favourite is absolutely lovely and perfect!