Name Help is a series at Appellation Mountain. Every Saturday, one reader’s name questions will be discussed.
We’re relying on thoughtful comments from the community to help expectant parents narrow down their name decisions. Thank you in advance for sharing your insight!
My husband and I have very different name preferences. He likes “strong” unisex names for girls (think Ryan) whereas I like more traditional feminine names (along lines of Evelyn).
I am not opposed to using a unisex name – our first daughter is named Harper Adele. If I heard the right one, paired with a feminine middle name, I could even go as far as using a more masculine name.
We are considering the name Beckett for a girl because we like the name Rebecca/Becca.
We both agree that our second daughter should also have a name that is flexible in terms of who she wants to be, whether an artist, attorney, or athlete. I loved that the name Harper had ties to so many different kinds of historical people, particularly literary.
Neither of us care about finding a name with a good nickname.
Family history is important to me, and I would like to use a family name for at least one middle name. We are open to having two middle names.
The possibilities are:
- On his side, the only name we would consider using is his mother’s maiden name, Pearson.
- On my side, there is a Marie that is important to both my father and mother’s families. The problem is that I prefer using it as a first name or part of a double first name only (or barring that, as a first middle name), but my husband is not crazy about it as a first name.
- Another name on my side is Rosa/Rose.
- We have toyed with using another form of my mother’s name, Jennifer. Maybe Genevieve? But it’s not a good pairing for Harper, as a first name paired with Pearson to represent both grandmothers.
Finally, our last name sounds like Van Dorn. The two words make every name longer, but the right name could sound perfect with either the “v” or the “d,” or just the overall feel of the last name.
Read on for my response, and please leave your thoughtful suggestions in the comments!
Congratulations on your second daughter! It sounds like you did a great job compromising on Harper Adele’s name, and it’s just a matter of finding something that works just as well for Harper’s sister.
When it comes to gender neutral names, there’s a wide range of possibilities:
- Some names feel tailored, even severe – but are overwhelmingly feminine in use, like Claire and Jane.
- Other names are so common for girls that we rarely associate them with boys today. Madison is in this camp, and I’d say Harper is, too.
- There’s a growing pool of names used for both genders. These are often nature names (River, Rowan), or more modern inventions (Jayden and friends).
- Some names have transitioned from boy to girl, or mostly-boy to mostly-girl. Think of surnames like Riley and Bailey. Surnames that can shorten to feminine nicknames – think of Ellison or Emerson – are especially likely to transition to girls’ names.
- Other names are overwhelmingly masculine, but it’s not unusual to meet girls with these names – Parker, Hunter. Your husband’s pick, Ryan, is in this category.
- And then there are names that feel aggressively masculine – though that doesn’t mean that you won’t find a girl called Hawkins or Rogan or Slade.
I suspect this is why Harper works for both of you. It has the gender neutral style your husband loves, but feels more like a tailored, but still feminine name, like Evelyn or Adele.
Let’s start with some possibilities that might fit, then talk about options for mixing in family names:
Maren – It’s definitely a feminine name, a cousin to Marina and Marinus. But it’s quite tailored, too, and I thought of it as a possible honor name for Marie.
Hadley – Hadley is almost as literary as Harper, and just as familiar as a girls’ name. Elizabeth Hadley Richardson became the first Mrs. Hemingway, and was the subject of the 2011 fictionalized account of Hadley and Ernest’s early married life, The Paris Wife.
Juniper – I agree that Genevieve isn’t the best sister name for Harper (though it isn’t at all unthinkable!) What do you think of nature name Juniper as an honor name for Jennifer? While it has a history of use for boys, Juniper is far more common for girls in the US.
Wren – Another nature name possibility. But is Wren Van Dorn restrained and elegant, or a little too choppy? I can’t decide.
Sloane – If you decide that single syllable names are an option, I’m tempted to suggest Sloane. While Ferris Bueller’s Day Off isn’t a work of great literature, it did make Sloane widely familiar as a name for girls.
Delaney – Delaney has been in steady use for girls over the last two decades, but never as popular as Mackenzie or Kennedy. Harper and Delaney share the same style, but have completely different sounds – I think that makes for a nice match.
Beckett – Beckett is far more common for boys as of 2014, when there were more than 1,500 newborn boys called Beckett compared to 79 girls. But I do think it works, exactly for the reason that you’ve pinpointed: Becky/Bex is a feminine favorite, widely familiar to thanks to the popularity of Rebecca. Shonda Rhimes has three daughters: Harper, Emerson, and Beckett.
I could go on – there are dozens and dozens of surname name possibilities for girls! Layer in nature names and tailored names that happen to feel like surname names, and it’s pages and pages of names.
But I think we need to take a few minutes and look at those family names.
Is it possible that you would consider Pearson as a given name? It’s definitely unexpected, but I don’t think it’s unwearable. Harper and Pearson sound right together. I’m guessing that’s not a front-runner, though, since you didn’t mention it in your letter.
If Pearson isn’t a first name possibility, I’m not so sure about using it as a middle name with a gender neutral first, for two reasons:
- I think it’s nice to have the option of a name that clearly indicates gender. Ryan Pearson Van Dorn is probably a boy. Ryan Evelyn Van Dorn is almost certainly a girl. While plenty of parents disregard this guideline, and plenty of kids don’t mind, I do think it’s worth considering.
- This is probably a matter of personal style, but Beckett Carter Smith always sounds a little like the name of a law firm to me, while Beckett Connor Smith is obviously a person’s name. Again, it’s not a rule – just something to consider.
You also have fabulous middle name possibilities that would anchor a less gender specific given name: Rose, Rosa, and Marie, as well as Jennifer.
If you’re not wild about passing down Jennifer, I’m inclined to cheer for Genevieve as a middle name, too. Adele and Genevieve are lovely names, both French in origin.
From my suggestions, I love the idea of Hadley, Delaney, or Juniper as a sister name for Harper. But I do think that Beckett – especially Beckett Genevieve, or maybe Beckett Marie Rose – would be a gorgeous choice for Harper’s sister.
One final thought: Evelyn actually started out as masculine, or at least gender neutral. (English writer Evelyn Waugh married a woman also named Evelyn; their friends called them he-Evelyn and she-Evelyn!) It’s solidly feminine now, but it would be easy to argue that Evelyn was the Ryan or Taylor of the early 1900s.
Readers, what would you suggest to Cathryn and her husband?
I think Delaney and Sloane fit perfectly with the sound and unisex-ness (?) of Harper. Ryan is 100% a boy name to me, not unisex but I know it’s used on girls. All the middles are feminine, so any of those would work in my mind, although I love Genevieve or Juniper as a middle to honor Jennifer. I would nix Pearson, unless like mentioned, used as a first. Great suggestions! I really like all these names, I would totally use Delaney if it is wasn’t for the fact that I dated a guy name Delaney, years ago haha!
Some names you can spell using the letters of the names…
Pearson + Marie:
Primerose, Rosamarie, Rosemaria, Rosemarie, Rosemarin, Serapiona; Anemarie, Arrosane, Eepramia, Eprosine, Erramona, Imerensa, Marensia, Mariposa, Merraine, Onaemrra, Primrose, Reinmara, Romarine, Rosamari, Rosemari, Rosemina, Rosmaria, Rosmarie, Rosmarin, Serapina, Serapine; Aerenia, Amirona, Amneris, Amorena, Amorina, Amorine, Anemona, Anemone, Armenia, Armonia, Armonie, Arsenia, Arsenie, Arsiena, Arsinoe, Asmeena, Aspirna, Einarra, Emirona, Epraema, Epraima, Epramia, Erasina, Eremona, Erisena, Ermione, Esperia, Iaernea, Irasema, Irenaea, Mairona, Mareena, Marenia, Mariane, Mariena, Mariene, Mariesa, Mariona, Marione, Mariora, Marnera, Marpesa, Marrisa, Meinara, Meinera, Meisane, Meraria, Meriana, Merrane, Morrisa, Naemrra, Nameera, Naseema, Naseera, Nemesia, Nisarra, Noraira, Norrisa, Omerina, Onesima, Oriansa, Osemana, Parinas, Parmena, Parmesa, Parrisa, Pensria, Perrana, Perrine, Poimena, Pransia, Preeria, Pinaere, Primana, Promise, Raimona, Rainara, Rainera, Ramanee, Rameena, Rameera, Rameesa, Rampion, Rasmena, Rasmina, Rasmine, Reimara, Reimera, Reinara, Reinera, Reisora, Resmina, Riemera, Roemera, Romaina, Romaine, Romaisa, Romania, Romaria, Romarni, Romeina, Roriana, Rosamai, Rosamee, Rosamie, Roseana, Roseane, Rosemae, Rosemai, Rosemia, Rosemin, Rosenia, Rosiana, Rosiane, Rosmana, Rosmari, Rosmina, Saemira, Samaire, Sameera, Samrosa, Saporma, Sareena, Sariane, Semiona, Seraina, Serapia, Sereana, Sereina, Seriana, Serpina, Serrina, Serrine, Siemera, Sieroma, Simeona, Simoena, Sinarra, Sinmara, Siomara, Sirpana, Snaeros, Sniorra, Snorrea, Snorria, Sorania, Soriana; Aemona, Aerona, Aeropa, Aerope, Aerria, Aesira, Aesona, Aimera, Aimona, Ainesa, Ainose, Amarin, Amaris, Amasie, Ameena, Ameera, Ameris, Amiora, Amoena, Amorea, Amoria, Amparo, Anaise, Aneera, Aneesa, Aneira, Anemon, Anoepa, Anoria, Aporia, Aprama, Apsorn, Arense, Ariane, Ariene, Ariona, Armani, Armena, Armina, Armine, Armosa, Arnera, Arnesa, Arnima, Arnisa, Arnora, Arnros, Aronie, Arpine, Arrena, Arrene, Arrona, Arrosa, Arsena, Arsene, Arsima, Arsine, Asiera, Asmeen, Asmina, Asmine, Aspera, Eamona, Eimara, Eimear, Eimera, Einara, Einera, Eirana, Eisena, Empera, Emrona, Enerra, Ensara, Eomera, Epemia, Epesia, Epione, Eprama, Eprema, Eprona, Erasma, Eriana, Eriona, Ermana, Ermena, Ermina, Ermine, Ermira, Ernara, Ernera, Ernesa, Ernira, Erosia, Esiana, Esiane, Esmara, Esmena, Esmina, Esmira, Espena, Espera, Esrona, Iarpra, Iasona, Ierona, Imrana, Ioarra, Iorama, Iosepa, Irenea, Irenes, Irmena, Isamar, Isaree, Isarra, Ismana, Ismara, Ismena, Ismene, Maarie, Mainor, Maiona, Maiora, Mairen, Maisen, Manasi, Manira, Mareen, Mareia, Marena, Marene, Maresa, Maresi, Marian, Marina, Marine, Marion, Marisa, Marise, Marnia, Marnie, Marona, Marosa, Marrei, Marren, Marrin, Marron, Marsia, Marsie, Masine, Meiera, Meraia, Merana, Merane, Merari, Merena, Merian, Merina, Merine, Merope, Meropi, Merran, Merrie, Mesena, Minora, Mioara, Miorra, Mirana, Mirena, Mirona, Mirren, Monara, Monira, Monisa, Morana, Morane, Moreen, Morena, Morene, Morine, Morisa, Morrie, Naeema, Naemia, Namira, Namora, Naomei, Naomie, Napira, Naseem, Nasera, Narima, Narisa, Nasima, Nasira, Neaera, Neaira, Nerisa, Nerise, Nesaie, Nesima, Nisara, Noamie, Noemia, Noemie, Nomara, Noreia, Norisa, Onarra, Oramia, Orensa, Oriana, Oriane, Oriara, Oriera, Ormara, Ornira, Orrina, Orsena, Orsina, Orsine, Osiana, Osmana, Osmara, Osmina, Osmine, Opirra, Pamina, Pansie, Parisa, Parmis, Parnia, Paroma, Pasion, Penrin, Pensri, Peonie, Perina, Perine, Perona, Perrie, Persea, Persia, Pierra, Pimena, Pirana, Pirena, Poesie, Porisa, Porsia, Praise, Pramia, Pranee, Priama, Promea, Prosia, Raeena, Ramani, Ramina, Ramira, Ramisa, Ramona, Ramone, Ransia, Ransom, Raonia, Rasima, Rasina, Rasine, Rasmia, Reason, Reeana, Reiara, Reiera, Remeni, Remina, Remine, Remona, Renera, Renisa, Resana, Rimera, Rimona, Rinora, Romaea, Romaia, Romana, Romane, Romara, Romena, Romera, Romina, Romine, Ronima, Rorana, Rosana, Rosane, Rosara, Rosaria, Rosarie, Rosean, Rosina, Rosine, Rosmai, Saemia, Saeros, Samera, Samina, Samine, Samira, Samora, Samrin, Samrra, Sanora, Sanera, Sapina, Sapira, Saraie, Sarane, Sareen, Sarena, Sarene, Sarian, Sarina, Sarine, Saripa, Sarnai, Sarona, Seiera, Semena, Semera, Semina, Semine, Semira, Semoia, Senara, Sepora, Serena, Serina, Serine, Sermin, Siarra, Sierra, Simana, Simara, Simena, Simera, Simona, Simone, Simran, Sinopa, Sipora, Sirena, Sirene, Sirona, Smaera, Smaria, Smirna, Snaeia, Snaera, Snaria, Snorra, Somaia, Somena, Somera, Soraia, Sorena, Sorina, Sorine, Sparra, Sporra
Rosa + Jennifer:
Annesofie, Sinforina; Annesofi, Annsofie, Efrosina, Efrosine, Eirfinna, Fransine, Joannise, Jofreira, Jofrejra, Jonasine, Josefina, Josefine, Josianne, Josienne, Naserian, Roseanne, Rosianne, Safronie, Sefarine, Serafine, Serenina, Serianne, Sofianne, Sorianne; Annsofi, Ansofie, Arienne, Arsenie, Arsinoe, Einnora, Eireann, Enorina, Erasine, Erianne, Erienna, Erisena, Erneisa, Esianne, Farners, Fennore, Fenrira, Fenrisa, Feronia, Finnros, Finnrra, Frannie, Freeria, Freesia, Fronnia, Fronnie, Frosina, Frosine, Ireneja, Jannise, Jansine, Jeanine, Jeannie, Jennesa, Jennise, Jennora, Jensina, Jensine, Jerinne, Jeroena, Jeronia, Jerrina, Jesenia, Joanine, Joanise, Joannie, Jofinna, Joneena, Jonsine, Josefia, Josefin, Josiane, Josiann, Nasreen, Nasrine, Nesrine, Nisreen, Noriane, Norrisa, Orensia, Orianne, Oriensa, Osianne, Rainera, Refrain, Reianne, Reinera, Reisora, Rejanne, Rejnera, Reniera, Rosaire, Rosanne, Rosarie, Roseane, Roseann, Rosenia, Rosiane, Rosiann, Sarenne, Sefanie, Sefinna, Serafie, Sereina, Seriane, Seriann, Sernina, Serrena, Serrina, Snaeros, Sniorra, Sofanie, Sofiane, Sofiann, Sofrena, Sonrisa, Soriane, Soriann; Aerfen, Ainose, Anfina, Anfine, Ansine, Ansofi, Aonene, Arense, Ariene, Arisje, Arnros, Aronie, Arrene, Arsene, Arsine, Efrena, Einera, Eisena, Ejnera, Enerra, Erenna, Eriane, Eriann, Erinna, Eriona, Erjona, Ernera, Ernesa, Ernira, Ernise, Ernsia, Erosia, Esiane, Esiann, Esrona, Fainne, Fanise, Fannei, Fannie, Fansie, Farine, Farore, Fenija, Ferona, Finnea, Finnja, Finnra, Fionna, Fionne, Firene, Fonsia, Fornia, Franni, Franse, Freija, Freina, Freine, Frensa, Frense, Frijna, Fronia, Fronie, Ioanne, Ionisa, Irenea, Irenes, Isaree, Jaione, Janine, Janire, Janise, Jannie, Jannis, Jasone, Jeanie, Jeanne, Jeanni, Jenesa, Jenifer, Jenina, Jenine, Jenisa, Jenise, Jennei, Jennie, Jensia, Jerisa, Jerise, Jerona, Jerrie, Jesena, Jesina, Jesine, Joanie, Joanne, Joeria, Joneen, Jonena, Jonene, Jonina, Jonine, Jonisa, Jonisa, Jonnie, Jorane, Jorani, Jorann, Joreen, Jorein, Jorena, Jorene, Joresa, Jorfia, Jorina, Jorine, Jorisa, Jorrea, Jorria, Josefa, Josien, Josifa, Josina, Josine, Nansie, Narine, Narjes, Narjis, Nasrin, Nefira, Nensie, Nereja, Nerija, Nerina, Nerine, Nerise, Nerona, Nesaie, Nesina, Nesrin, Nienor, Niesje, Noreen, Noreia, Norene, Norina, Norine, Norisa, Norjis, Ofanie, Oranne, Orensa, Orfeja, Oriane, Oriann, Orjera, Ornira, Orrina, Orsena, Orsina, Orsine, Osanne, Osiane, Rajnee, Rannei, Rasine, Reanne, Reason, Reeann, Reiane, Reiann, Reiera, Reifra, Rejane, Rejann, Rejera, Rejora, Renisa, Rensje, Rianne, Rinora, Ronena, Ronija, Ronnia, Ronnie, Ronnja, Rosane, Rosann, Rosean, Rosena, Rosina, Rosine, Safine, Safire, Safron, Sajnee, Sanije, Sannie, Sarene, Sarine, Sefora, Seiera, Sejera, Senena, Senera, Senija, Senina, Sennia, Senona, Serena, Serifa, Serife, Serina, Serine, Sianne, Sienna, Sierra, Sinoja, Siofna, Siofra, Sirena, Sirene, Sirona, Snorra, Sofian, Sofija, Sofina, Sofine, Sonera, Sonija, Sonnia, Sonnie, Sonnja, Sorena, Sorene, Sorian, Sorija, Sorina, Sorine, Sreeja
I love Delaney! Delaney Pearson, or Hadley Pearson. I think Marie is way overused as a middle name, and rose is along the same lines. Harper and Hadley or Harper and Delaney both sound like good combos! best wishes with your second baby girl!
I actually know a real-life sibset called Harper and Delaney. They’re both in college now and are really lovely people.
Is Rosemarie a no go? I immediately thought of Jude and Elliot, like others did. Jude Rosemarie, Elliot Rosemarie?
Or, if you wanna go literary, Eliot. 🙂
C in DC says
What about Pear as a middle? Romy Pear, Rosemary Pear, Evelyn Pear, Genevieve Pear. I also love Beckett Rose or Beckett Marie or even Beckett Jennifer. Beckett makes me think Buckley.
Do you like Jude? Harper and Jude. There were 2,564 boys named Jude last year. This is a boy’s name that I can see working well on girls, given that it could be a nickname for Judith or Judy (not tracked by SSA). I’ve met a little girl named Jude and it was quite adorable and spunky all at once.
If you want a name to be undoubtedly feminine with a nod towards hubby’s preference for strong, unisex names, I’d suggest:
– Pilar. Harper and Pilar. It seems to work with any of the middle names that you are considering. My only hesitation…. If you say Harper Pilar too fast, would it sound like Harpers Bazaar? I could be overthinking this.
– Muriel. Harper and Muriel. Muriel Rose. Muriel Pearson. Again, I think all middle names work.
– Simone. Harper and Simone. Simone Marie Rose. Simone Pearson.
– Brynn. Harper and Brynn.
This one may be a bit more frilly for hubs, but I wonder if you’d like Paloma. Harper and Paloma seem sweet together to me.
Have you looked at Rose variants in foreign languages? There may be options there.
Everly seems like a perfect style match and alternative to Evelyn. It’s (arguably) unisex, and sounds modern, like Harper. It seems to be gaining in popularity slowly, like Harper did before the Beckham… I just realised that Harper Beckham sounds pretty close to Harper and Beckett, which is neither here nor there but worth considering.
Everly pairs well with lots of the names already mentioned:
Everly Rebecca (love)
I also love the suggestions of Juniper and Maren.
I love the suggestion of Sloane! Other suggestions that may go with your style: Sutton, Lennox, Merritt, Hollis, Ellison, and Campbell. Good luck!
I love Maren, Hadley, Sloane, Ellison and Emerson for you! Great suggestions! I’d add Royce, Campbell, Cameron, Blair, Blake, Aubrey, Avery, Ellis, Hollis, Sutton, Collins, and Carson. I know girls with these names and they all wear well. I agree with the posters who said that three surnames isn’t as pleasing as a mix of first names and surnames, and I agree with Abby that a feminine name in the middle would balance a surname/unisex name well. I love the suggestions of Rosemarie and Marie Rose, both French like Adele and feminine without being too frilly. You could hyphenate Marie-Rose if you don’t like two middle names.
Forgot to add that with Pearson I would pair a nature name or clearly feminine name up front, like Maren, Juniper, or Evelyn.
How about Elliot?
Elliot Marie Van Dorn
Elliot Rose Van Dorn
Elliot Rosemarie Van Dorn
Elliot Rosemary Van Dorn
Harper and Elliot Van Dorn
I like Tamsin and Avery for you. I think Tamsin Marie and Avery Pearl (as a version of Pearson) would go well with Harper Adele. Best of luck!
Oh I love Tamsin. Always have.
I love Maren, so strong and sure, and I think it would be a wonderful choice. Maren Juniper. Maren Pearson. Maren also makes me think of Morgan. Harper and Morgan sound like sisters to me. Plus I adore the meaning and stories around Morgan. I also want to suggest one of my all time favorite, almost guilty pleasure names: Peregrine. It has some history of use as a man’s name, though never very popular. I like it for a girl though. A bold nature name with great nickname potential. Pera or Perry are my favorites. Plus I like how it shares the “per” with Harper. I think it could work for honor name Pearson too.
I know a little girl named Beckett Rose, both family names in her case, so when I saw Beckett mentioned that was my first thought. I think it is a lovely match to Harper Adele. I personally think Pearson Genevieve, or Pearson Rose would be a lovely name for a little girl, for Harper’s little sister. Though Pearson Genevieve Van Dorn might be considered a bit long, I see nothing wrong with it. Possibly a variant of Jennifer like Jenna for the middle name, as in Pearson Jenna Van Dorn or even Pearson Jenae Van Dorn. As you can see I am kind of rooting for Pearson.
I think Maren is a great suggestion as well, but I have loved that name for some time. I would add the suggestion of Marit or Merrit both of which have share the tailored unisex vibe of Harper, and could be honor names for Marie though neither are actually related to Marie. Marit Pearson Van Dorn while not girly does not seem like a law office, to me anyway.
I think Evelyn is a great choice as well, Evelyn Pearson works well. Someone suggested Tate, but I think Tatum is a great fit with Harper. Tatum is feminine but not overtly so— Tatum Genevieve and Harper Adele sound nice together.
Thumbs up! Tatum and Harper are fabulous together.
The name Evelyn sparked me to look up some more early crossover surname names that went to the girls. Of any appeal?
Ashley, Beverly, Evelyn, Hilary, Jocelyn, Joyce, Kelly, Lynn, Meredith, Shannon, Shirley, Sidney, Vivian, and Whitney
I really like Meredith. Meredith Pearson Van Dorn sounds feminine but not like a law firm and has Meri as a sweet feminine nickname.
What about Romy? It would incorporate both Rose and Marie. Romy Genevieve, perhaps?
I don’t love the name Beckett Van Dorne (it really sounds like a law firm to me) but Harper Van Dorne has the same problem for me, and they don’t seem to mind that. I like Beckett Rose, if that’s the case, though I think they are better off going with a short choice. Maren Van Dorne. Brie Van Dorne. Sloane Rosemarie Van Dorne. What about Tate? I always think that can go feminine because it rhymes with Kate. Tate Genevieve Van Dorne.
Seems to me the perfect name is already in the opening discussion — Evelyn! Cathryn likes the name, and it fits her husband’s requirements: Strong, and unisex (the name has had an interesting gender-evolution, over the years. As a form of Aveline, it’s always been historically female, but the spelling Evelyn at the turn of the previous century suddenly skyrocketed as a masculine name). I’m glad to see Abby put in a plug for it too at the end of the post.