Name Help is a series at Appellation Mountain. Every week, we discuss reader’s name questions, usually on Tuesdays and Fridays. We’re relying on thoughtful comments from the community to help expectant parents narrow down their name decisions. Thank you in advance for sharing your insight! To have your question considered, email appmtn (at) gmail. Looking for your own private #namehelp post? Order one here.
WHAT’S THE RIGHT SPELLING?
Kallie writes:
My mother is the last of her family line, with no brothers. She took my dad’s name, so her part of the Maitland family ends with her. When I was a kid and someone brought it up, I thought it sounded old-fashioned and sexist. Maybe part of me still does. But now that my grandparents are gone, it means more, especially as we start our own family.
My mom always jokes that her maiden name means “evil genius.” I understand that’s maybe taking creative license, but I kind of love it.
When my husband and I started talking about future children’s names, I floated the idea of using Maitland as a middle name and he agreed.
But now that we’re expecting our first, a daughter, he asked what I thought of naming her Maitland.
I kind of like the idea, but maybe I like it better if we spell it Maitlyn, like Kaitlyn with an M. My husband loved that idea, and now we’re sort of leaning toward this spelling.
If it matters, that’s how my mother’s family always pronounced the name, with “lin” at the end, not the “land” sound. The D is silent, if that makes sense.
When I told my sister, she hated it. She said it’s not the same name, and it’s too cute and creative, and it’s not a good last name to use as a first name to begin with.
To be fair, we both have K names that are a little bit of a pain sometimes, and I know hers is more of an issue than mine. But I don’t think Maitlyn is the same thing at all.
I regret telling her, but I also want some feedback about whether maybe she’s saying something I need to hear.
So … should we name our daughter Maitlyn or Maitland? And is my spelling a horrible idea?
Please read on for my response and leave your thoughtful suggestions in the comments.
THE CASE FOR MAITLYN
Abby replies:
Congratulations on your new daughter!
Also … Oof! That’s some serious feedback from your sister – and your daughter’s aunt.
Without knowing anyone involved, let’s say this: our ideas about names are almost always based on our personal experience with our own name. So let’s agree that your sister doesn’t think she, personally, would enjoy being named Maitlyn … or Maitland.
But that doesn’t really answer your question, does it?
So let’s keep a few things in mind:
- We have absolutely no way of knowing how our children will feel about their names in the future. Maybe your daughter will find Maitlyn confusing and burdensome. Or maybe she’ll love the connection to her grandmother. Either is possible; most of us end up somewhere in between.
- We do know how we feel about a particular name now. It sounds like Maitlyn is the name that feels right for this child.
- We can objectively compare any name we’re considering to popularity data. This can either build our confidence in the name, or make us re-think it.
That last point is where I want to spend our time.
FINDING THE RIGHT SPELLING FOR MAITLYN
So if the question comes down to Maitlyn or Maitland, I’m going to vote for the former. Here’s why:
- Kaitlyn peaked around the year 2000. This Caitlin/Kathleen cousin became the. most popular spelling of the name. That makes me think lots of us a) know a Kaitlyn and b) instinctively see/hear Maitlyn as Kaitlyn-with-an-M.
- Madelyn is the most popular spelling of the name now. Madeline also ranks in the US Top 100, but Madelyn is about a dozen spaces ahead. Evelyn ranks in the current Top Ten. So -lyn ending names are familiar. No name ending in -land (or -lynd) ranks in the current Top 1000.
- Mae names are having a moment. Maeve ranks in the US Top 100. Maisie is rising fast. Names like Mae, Mabel, Macy, and Mavis are all current. Maitlyn fits right in.
Maitland has been used as a given name, in small numbers, for boys and girls alike over the years. It’s almost certainly for the same reasons you’re considering it now – a family name.
Maitlyn has seen occasional use, too, beginning in the 1990s. That’s almost certainly thanks to the influence of Kaitlyn.
While it’s quite rare, and would doubtless take some explaining and a bit of let-me-spell-it-for-you, I think it works.
My only other advice would be to choose a more conventional, classic feminine middle name. Maitlyn Elise or Maitlyn Celeste, maybe?
If you want reassurance about the name … YES! Both options are great! You and hubby have a beautiful gift of a name for your daughter whichever way you go!
As for the ending, I like both but perhaps lyn more because it feels more name like. My fear with surname names is always the law firm effect should your child ever change their last name. Maitlyn side steps this in my head. Kaitlyn/Caitlyn plus Marilyn (and Evelyn, Gwendolyn, Rosalyn, Adalyn, Jocelyn, etc) make this feel really like it lies solidly in a girls name list. I don’t go to “creative spelling vibes” at all. Uncommon – no doubt. Name that likely has family history – you bet. Art nouveau style creative – nope.
So, pick whichever makes your heart sing. You can’t go wrong!
Oh yes – I do always get Law Firm vibes from names like Cooper Elliott Smith. Still a great name but … could be a kid, might be a LLP.
You and your husband are clearly putting a lot of thought and care into your daughter’s name.
I love that he was the one who suggested putting it in the first spot: it seems that your values are aligned in correcting some of the sexist imbalance of the past.
So, I really think that whatever spelling you choose, as long as it feels authentic to you, it will be the right choice.
However, when I imagine which spelling I would rather have as my own name, the answer is Maitland.
It has a clear connection to the family tree. Even if people have never met someone with the name before, they can quickly understand, “It was my grandmother’s maiden name.”
It feels sophisticated and has a strong sense of history. (And just for fun: it would be cool to watch the movie Beetlejuice and see my name on the “Maitland Hardware” shop sign.)
Maitlyn is harder to explain. “It’s like Kaitlyn but with an M” doesn’t solve the spelling issue, because Caitlin is also a common (and longer-standing) spelling.
To me, it looks like a typo. My phone tried to Autocorrect Maitlyn to Kaitlyn just now. It also sounds a bit like “mating”, which is less than ideal.
There’s also some (unfair and somewhat classist) negativity out there toward creatively spelled names that end with variations on “-lyn”. In the same way that people now look back on the Aiden/Jayden/Brayden/Kaden craze of the 2010s, I think -lyn endings will read as dated in a decade or so.
So, Maitland is my personal preference.
But you are your daughter’s parents, and you will be the ones explaining to her what her name means and why you chose it.
If you imagine naming her Maitland, and it feels like a downgrade from the spelling you invented, you should follow your heart. However your daughter eventually feels about her name, she deserves to have parents who absolutely love it.
I didn’t even think about the Beetlejuice angle – could be very fun!!
You and your husband have put a lot of thought and love into naming your daughter! It’s a wonderful honour name!
I’m still torn with spelling because initially I thought Maitlyn but then I started seeing a variation of Madilyn (Madeline) and wondered if that would be mixed up (thinking it was Matilyn rather than Maitlyn? I may be way over thinking it though.
Ultimately people who use her name get use to the spelling and pronunciation very very quickly so whichever way you decide to go you may have to initially remind people but they will get it quick :)! Go with the one that makes you and your husband most excited! And don’t ask any more family members because they might be too close to the situation to offer helpful advice! (Speaking from experience!!)
Best of luck!
Thank you – that’s a helpful perspective, and a good thought re: Madilyn.
I love the name! I think this is a scenario where either way you’ll be explaining something. If it’s Maitlyn, you’ll probably get questions about the origin or confusion that it’s a typo but people with know how to pronounce it. If it’s Maitland, people probably intuitively know it’s a family name or a name with meaning but may need help with pronunciation. I’d favor whichever explanation bothers you less. I also love the suggestion of a D- middle name.
Good point re: knowing how to spell Maitland.
You seem more excited by the Maitlyn spelling, and I think the similarity to Caitlyn makes it easier not harder. There will be explanation needed either way, but that goes for most names.
I wondered if using a D middle name would be fun, and preserve the original just a little? Then you are really only changing one letter, and that to make it more name-like!
Maitlyn Daisy
Maitlyn Diana
Maitlyn Daphne
Maitlyn Delia
Maitlyn Delphine
or you could go with
Maitlan Daniella (or other D name), but that does seem more hassle. The “an” ending isn’t, to me, one of the more intuitive variations of Caitlyn. I think here I would end up using the original spelling and choosing another middle.
I echo what Renee said … your whole process seems thoughtful and considerate by both you and your husband. Whatever you choose, it will obviously be chosen with love and thoughtfulness. That’s a gift in itself.
All the very best!
A D middle name is SUCH a clever idea!