This story is just so, so frustrating!
They’re new parents. His mom isn’t a native English speaker and, it just so happened, couldn’t quite say the name the couple chose for their daughter. Instead, she’s calling the daughter by a nickname in her native language.
This feels like the best possible kind of compromise.
But then the new mom’s mother poked fun at his mom for not being able to say the name. (Yes, in front of the other grandma.) The new mom, to her credit, told her mom it was absolutely not okay to mock her mother-in-law.
Again, the right thing happened.
But then, then, then …
The new mom was not on board.
So this is my soapbox moment: in those exhausting, exhilarating days of new parenthood, remember that emotions run sky high, and the opportunity for bad behavior is correspondingly elevated.
One grandmother’s rudeness should not taint a compromise that pleased everyone else.
And the parents? Should recognize that they’re a team. In a perfect world, they would’ve considered his mother’s native language and realized the problem in advance.
(But it’s a big challenge. My in-laws aren’t native English speakers and I grilled my husband about our firstborn’s name … aaaaand we were still completely blindsided by the nickname they gave our new baby boy.)
Back to the dilemma. Their daughter is named. They like the name. One grandmother has adopted a sweet nickname that everyone (who gets a vote) was cool with. The other grandmother behaved badly and owes a few apologies.
Changing their daughter’s name? Totally unnecessary – though I understand the spike of anxiety behind that new dad’s response.
What do you think? Would you be tempted to change your child’s name?
ELSEWHERE ONLINE
The world is filled with 5-letter names. Yes, this week’s Name Wordle is here! True story: I make these, and then forget the answer before I share them, so I have keep a Notes file with all the links + answers.
What would you name four girls and a boy? Welcome to the Freels quintuplets! Their parents chose Adelyn, Eliana, Linnea, and Harper, plus brother Fisher.
I could read the names on Eventide Pennants all day. Linden, Vale, Nell + some more great finds.
Swistle delivers exactly the right advice here. We sometimes think it’s all or nothing with family names, but really, the best names often combine a little bit of both. And absolutely, it’s important to hand down names from mom’s side of the family, too!
Swooning over the new French Top 100 right now. Romy, Lou, Alba, Agathe! Jules, Raphael, Sacha, Malo!
That’s all for this week! As always, thank you for reading – and have a great week.
That is a sad story! It sounds like it turned out alright in the end, though. I’m glad they found another name they like and a nickname that works for everyone.