Name Help is a series at Appellation Mountain. Every week, we discuss reader’s name questions, usually on Tuesdays and Fridays. We’re relying on thoughtful comments from the community to help expectant parents narrow down their name decisions. Thank you in advance for sharing your insight! To have your question considered, email appmtn (at) gmail. Looking for your own private #namehelp post? Order one here.
NAMING A BROTHER FOR PETER
Brigid writes:
We have three children: Aurelia, Elisabeth, and Peter.
They’re all honor names and all historic, New Testament-ish meaningful names that we adore, but the oldest definitely stands out.
If this baby is a girl, her name will be Helen.
For a boy, we both like the name Stephen well enough, and it’s a special honor name. That may be the winner! But I’d love it if we could find something I get a little more excited about. Or maybe I just need a good nickname for Stephen, pronounced Steven, not Stefan. Is Shep a ridiculous stretch? I don’t love Steve.
Names we have ruled out for various reasons are as follows:
- Alden
- Alec
- Anthony
- Arthur
- August
- Benjamin
- Callum
- Calvin
- Cecil
- Clement
- Cole
- Cyril
- Cyrus
- David
- Dean
- Del
- Dominic
- Edmund
- Elijah
- Ezra
- Frederick
- Glenn
- Hayden
- Jack
- Jasper
- John
- Jonah
- Joseph
- Judah
- Jude
- Julian
- Malcolm
- Malachi
- Marc
- Marius
- Martin
- Matthias
- Nicholas
- Paul
- Percy
- Perry
- Phillip
- Robin
- Roman
- Raphael
- Samuel
- Simon
- Timothy
- Thomas
I’d love your advice.
Please read on for my response and leave your thoughtful suggestions in the comments.
IF NOT STEPHEN, THEN WHAT?
Abby replies:
Congratulations on baby four!
My initial reaction: okay, this baby’s name is Stephen. Because pretty much every other name is already ruled out, right?
But then I took a deep breath, looked at the list, and realized there are still lots of traditional, handsome choices with a mix of meaning and New Testament-era roots that could be perfect for your family.
So let’s talk about Stephen first, then move on to some other names.
NICKNAMES FOR STEPHEN
- Shep – Is it a stretch? Yes. Is it impossible? No, not really. The letters are there, if not exactly the sounds. If you use it consistently, it will stick.
- Van – Maybe it should be Ven, but I hear Van. And I think it’s a pretty great short form.
- Finn – Again, almost certainly a stretch – but Phen says Finn to me.
- Stef – This could get confusing. But I can imagine pronouncing your son’s name like Steven but shortening it to Stef.
- Steny, Ten, Tenny – All of these are a bit of a stretch, but maybe one of them will appeal more than Shep?
I actually wonder if the best approach is simply to avoid any nickname, including Steve.
I’ve heard Stephen/Steven/Stefan in use a handful of times in recent years. None of those little boys answered to any kind of a nickname and it worked. The two-syllable, ends-with-N Stephen sounds natural in a classroom with boys called Logan, Ethan, and Roman.
MORE NAMES FOR PETER’S BROTHER
ANDREW
Like Stephen, I think Andrew works best when used in full.
FELIX
A New Testament name with a lovely meaning – happy.
GABRIEL
Shorten it to Gabe or use it in full. While it’s a popular choice, Gabriel is a meaningful name with a compelling sound.
LUCAS or LUKE
I checked your list twice to make sure Lucas/Luke wasn’t already ruled out! It’s a time-tested classic with a strong meaning – light – and New Testament bona fides. It’s said that Luke traveled with Paul to Asia Minor, as well as Greece and Rome.
NATHANIEL
The New Testament often spells this name Nathanael, but the -iel spelling is far more familiar in American English. (Think Nathaniel Hawthorne.) Like Gabriel, there’s a handy nickname option – Nate.
SILAS
A rising favorite among Biblical boy names, Silas comes with an outdoorsy meaning: forest or woods, from the Latin silva. I particularly like the way a name like Silas represents a slightly different style than Peter. Traditional, yes, but more contemporary.
ZACHARY
This name might read slightly 90s. But while the name’s popularity peaked around the same time as Super Nintendo and Nirvana, it’s really more of a classic. After all, Zacharias is the father of John the Baptist, so this name has roots.
WILLIAM
While William doesn’t appear in the Bible, it’s a rock solid classic not on your already-ruled-out-list. I love it with your older kids’ names, so thought I’d mention it.
Overall, I’m kind of in love with Stephen called Finn, but … it’s every bit as much of a stretch as Stephen called Shep. I think a lot of it comes down to when and where you plan to use the nickname and how much you find Steve/Stevie problematic. If Shep is what you’ll call your son, then no one can argue with that, right? Maybe the wider world will adopt it, or maybe he’ll mostly answer to Stephen at school.
The only reason I’d say Stephen could be an issue? If nickname Steve/Stevie feels problematic for you. Because it’s possible he’ll come home from third grade or baseball practice or something answering to a nickname you don’t expect, but he really likes. If it’s Steve or Stevie will that be an issue? I’m guessing the answer is no.
If not Stephen, I think I’m most drawn to Gabriel. I love the way it’s a little longer, like your girls’ names, but still a solid traditional choice, like your son’s name.
I think Stephen “Shep” works. It’s unconventional but nicknames don’t always have to make perfect sense.
As for new suggestions for something classic but exciting, would you consider Davis? I see David is on your list of ruled out names so maybe Davis is also a no but that S ending is just enough to make it feel classic yet refreshing. Bonus: Davis means “beloved”
I see John, Joseph, and Jonah are all on your “no” list but what do you think of Jonas? Similar to David/Davis, Jonas seems just different enough from Joseph/Jonah to feel classic yet fun. I think it really bridges the gap between Aurelia and Peter and Elisabeth.
Aurelia, Elisabeth, Peter, and Jonas sound wonderful together.
Congrats on baby!
It does sound like Steven is the winner and I really like him for his meaning and with Peter. I know a little Steven nicknamed Ven and I really like Van as a nickname.
I love that you’ll have connected names but all unique initials and endings— not easy to do with a big family. I’ll throw in Tobias which pairs well with Aurelia but has Toby which sounds so cute with Peter. Or James because it pairs with everything well and Jamie is so handsome. Lastly, Francis. I met a little boy named Francis yesterday and loved hearing his name. It seems to bridge gap between all of the sibling names so well!
I like Stephen, nn Finn better than Shep, although I like that nn too. My brain has a harder time going from Stephen to Shep though. I feel like it works on paper but not with sound. Finn works better with the sounds of the name. Btw we chose our 2nd & 3rd children’s nns based on how their older siblings pronounced their name at their birth. We ended up with unique nns that no one else has. My 2nd ended up exclusively using his full name, while my 3rd uses his nn most of the time (he still can’t spell his full name lol). We have to spell his nickname for people and explain how he got it, but it works.
If not Stephen, do you like Shepherd? It’s Biblical, though not as a given name, it’s got the similar sounds to Stephen, so maybe you can convince family that it’s still an honour name.
I haven’t memorized your “no” list, but how about Hugh/Hugo
Simeon
Philip
Joel
Congratulations on baby 4!
Shepherd is such a good thought!
I think Stephen nn Finn/Finny or even Shep would work! Whatever you fall in love with then go with that. It seems like the name Stephen is the winner for you already :)!
Nicknames come from all different sources and for all sorts of reasons so it’s a nickname if you say it is and it will stick for them if you use it consistently like Abby suggested!
I have one child I call “Hen/Hennie” and her name starts with a hard C sound. It just came organically – that said, I’m the only one who calls her that so perhaps if you want a nickname that he goes by publicly/with friends and family and eventually school, then perhaps stick with one that somewhat resembles Stephen in sound or letter form! Good luck and congratulations!
DMS, I think that distinction about how you use the nickname is a really good point. My son still answers to his childhood nickname at home + with my family; pretty much everybody else calls him Alex. It sometimes catches me by surprise when I hear someone casually refer to him by his real name, but I come from a family of hard core nicknamers, so it really, really depends!
If you like the nn Shep, why not Shepherd? Still traditional although from a surname perspective. Definitely New Testament-ish with the built in nn you love. Also, it sort of bridges the gap between Aurelia, Elisabeth, and Peter better than Stephen does for me.
Bonus if you have Schaffer or a Rachel/Rachelle in the family since those meanings are related to shepherd/sheep.
I personally would avoid Gabriel (despite loving the name) due to the popular singer/songwriter Peter Gabriel.
Other thoughts:
Francis
Nicodemus (Nico)
Titus
Tobias
Jude
Seth
Jesse
James
Very good point about the potential for Shepherd to bridge the gap between more traditional/more uncommon names.
I believe in nn’s that skip the first obvious syllable. Believe me, Stephen nn Steni is NOT a stretch. Same with Michael nn Miles
Sorry – I wrote too quickly. Balthazar has other better nicknames, I think.
I was thinking of Bartholomew, nickname Tolly. One of the apostles.
My little nephew, Casper, has a friend who is Stephen called Finn (Finny). I think it is to distinguish him from his father with the same name, and it is a stretch, but seems to work.
Also, while I am mentioning Casper – what about his name? One of the 3 wise men. Or even Balthazar, nn Tolly. (Definitely distinctive.)
These are my initial thoughts & sending all best wishes!