Naming Twins in a Big Extended Family

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SO MANY NAMES ARE TAKEN

Erika writes:

My partner and I are expecting boy/girl twins this spring.

I come from a large, complicated family: two older full siblings, plus five step-siblings and another five half-siblings. In different ways, we’re pretty close and as much as I’m grateful for that, I’m realizing that I have 16 nieces and nephews whose names I cannot use.

In addition, my partner works with children. There are so many names that are just not options because of this.

Our last name sounds like Camer plus otto, which can be hard to work with, too.

After avoiding the topic for as long as possible, I’m now at 26 weeks and could easily deliver toward the end of next month, though obviously we’re hoping for longer. Other parents have told me that having names figured out in advance can relieve some of the stress of early days, especially if there’s a NICU stay involved.

Here are the names that we pulled together on our list, but I don’t think we’re there at all.

BOY NAMES

• Alistair – I like the Scottish energy but neither of us is Scottish at all so maybe that’s weird
• Brady – The name I always liked when I was little, and what I wanted to name our dog (she came with a different name), so it’s not really on our list, but it’s not exactly off the list either, if you know what I mean
• George – My partner’s favorite. I think I’m warming to it, especially because our last name is long
• River – Probably the name we agree on most, but not sure
• Roger – The name of someone very important in our lives but I just don’t see this for a kid
• Wade – I like it because it’s short but it sounds like a cowboy name and that’s not us

GIRL NAMES

• Amara – Probably not with our last name, but with both agree
• Junie – Love this, but my partner isn’t sold
• Loretta – Same thing as Amara, we sort of agree, but it’s not great with our last name, also we like Lottie/Lettie as a nickname, but don’t agree on it as a first name
• Meadow – Partner’s favorite, I’m not convinced
• Miriam – Another name from my partner, I really don’t like it
• Sophie – A name I’m really liking just since we found out the twins were boy/girl and while I know Sophia is a very popular name, we actually don’t have one in our family, which seems like a small miracle

I think we need someone to help us go through our list. Even when it feels like we’re getting closer to one name, it seems like we can never find two names that go together. Or could we name them Meadow and George, or is that weird?

Please read on for my response and leave your thoughtful suggestions in the comments.

FIGURING OUT WHAT MATTERS MOST

Abby replies:

Congratulations on your twins!

Big families are complicated. While I think we’re sometimes too cautious about cousins sharing names, it does sound like your can’t-use list is legitimately a hurdle.

The good news? There are gajillions of names. I think about names every single day of my life. Have for years. And I am still routinely surprised by wearable, interesting names I’ve never considered previously.

In other words? Naming twins in a big extended family is tough, but I think you’re on the right track.

Sometimes it helps to articulate the most significant factors:

• You’re working with a long surname that rules out certain sounds, like Amara or Loretta
• Your taste runs the gamut from classic George to modern Meadow
• Ideally, your twins’ names will coordinate in some way, though exactly how is open for discussion

NAMES FOR A SON

I think it’s time for a closer look at your current list and some fresh suggestions, too.

Let’s drop Alistair. It’s a great name, but combined with Camera-plus-otto and no Scottish heritage, I think it’s a reach. Brady, Roger, and Wade also sound like names you – for someone else.

That leaves George and River. They’re different names, but I think they both have potential.

I’m also going to suggest:

ALEX/ALEXANDER

Alistair’s more familiar cousin.

HAYES

Wade, Cade, and Trey read rather home-on-the-range. Hayes feels more polished.

JESSE

A traditional boys’ name with plenty of warmth.

LUKE/LUCA

Luca leans into your Italian-sounding surname. Luke keeps it more classic.

MASON

All the strong long A sounds of Brady and Wade, but I like this better for your family.

WELLS

There’s something so positive about Wells, almost a midpoint between classic William and contemporary Brooks.

NAMES FOR A DAUGHTER

We’ll take the same approach for girls’ names. Amara and Loretta are great, but probably not with your last name. It sounds like the hurdle to using Junie or Sophie might be the name’s too-casual style. Meadow is a perfect match for River – but possibly too similar! And Miriam is a sister for George, but it sounds like neither of those are exactly right, either.

CHLOE

An alternative to Sophie that might feel slightly more complete. (To be clear, it’s not – but it can feel that way.)

GEORGIA

Obviously not with George as a brother, but maybe you would both love this for a daughter? Nickname Georgie might appeal, too.

JOSIE/JOSEPHINE

Also inspired by Sophie, would Josie as a nickname for Josephine appeal? While Josephine is a long name, it’s so familiar that I think it works well with your four-syllable surname.

JUNIPER

A midpoint between Junie and Meadow.

MABEL

Take Meadow and Miriam, mix in some Wade and Brady, and maybe Mabel is the perfect answer.

ROSE

A nature name with the same classic style as George.

TWIN NAMES: POSSIBLE COMBINATIONS

As you’ve noted, you have two challenges: naming twins in a big extended family, but also balancing your children’s names, right?

RIVER and GEORGIA

One is more modern, the other slightly more traditional. But I think they do check the same boxes – a sort of vaguely outdoors energy, in a current, but not invented, kind of way.

GEORGE AND JUNIPER

The same idea applies to George and Juniper as River and Georgia. But I really like the way George and Juniper share a sound without actually duplicating an initial. And George and Junie sound even more coordinated.

GEORGE and MABEL

Another option: choose a sparky, retro name to match George. I love Mabel as a midpoint between Meadow, Miriam, and Junie.

MASON and SOPHIE

Two Top 100 names, yes, but if they’re not taken, they’re sort of perfect together.

HAYES and CHLOE

Possibly my two favorite compromise choices paired together.

I keep coming back to River and Georgia or George and Juniper. Maybe River Alistair and Georgia Miriam or George Hayes and Juniper Brady? If we’re looking only at the fresh suggestions, I love the idea of Hayes River and Chloe Miriam.

Readers, over to you! What would you name their twins, and any suggestions for naming twins in a big extended family?