Name Help is a series at Appellation Mountain. Every week, we discuss reader’s name questions, usually on Tuesdays and Fridays. We’re relying on thoughtful comments from the community to help expectant parents narrow down their name decisions. Thank you in advance for sharing your insight! To have your question considered, email appmtn (at) gmail. Looking for your own private #namehelp post? Order one here.
WE’VE NEVER HEARD THIS NAME BEFORE
Rochelle writes:
We are pregnant with a boy, due in March. This is our first baby and because of all the things, he might be our only.
Because it was such a process to get here, we really didn’t talk about names for the last few years. Originally, we had a list that I still keep. Knox, Beau, Jude, Tate, Flynn, Kai/Kye, Rome.
We sort of agree on these names still, but they don’t excite me so much anymore. Friends and family have used some of the names, not just for kids but my sister-in-law named their new puppy Beau. (To be fair, I don’t think she had any idea it was on our maybe list.)
It feels like it’s finally time to think about a name again, and I found myself drawn to names that I don’t hear on other kids. Rhone, like the river, was my favorite, while my husband preferred Wolf/Wolfe. (We couldn’t decide on the spelling.)
Then one night I woke up and just thought Swain. His name is Swain.
I love it with our last name, which starts with a K and sounds like kella-her.
People I’ve mentioned it to seem unsure of what to say, and it doesn’t always get a lot of love from what I’ve seen online.
So I guess I want to know if it’s a real name? And if it will be a problem? Or if we should consider something else instead.
I’d also like help with middle names maybe. There’s really nothing we want to use, no family names, etc., and the first name choice has been so overwhelming that thinking about a middle name seems so hard.
Please read on for my response and leave your thoughtful suggestions in the comments.
IS SWAIN THE PERFECT CHOICE?
Abby replies:
Congratulations on your son!
If it helps, I think your experience with names is common. You’re ahead of the curve when you first start imagining your family. By the time that’s a reality, your favorites names have become everybody else’s favorite names, too! They feel like they belong to a different moment. Maybe even a different version of yourself.
That’s even more true, sometimes, when the path to parenthood feels long.
All that said, your style feels remarkably steady and consistent. If you’d been thinking about William or Theodore and now were drawn to Swain? That’s a stark difference, from classic boy names to seldom-heard rarities. But the leap from Flynn or Tate to Swain? It’s just a tiny little step, really.
Now let’s talk about the name.
ABOUT THE NAME SWAIN
Swain is very much a real name.
It has Old Norse roots and means young man or servant. It was used in medieval England, and thus became an occupational surname in the key of Taylor or Carter.
My first thought: Sweyn Forkbeard, King of Denmark at the turn of the 11th century. He also ruled England and Norway at different points.
He’s not the only Sweyn/Swein/Swain in the history books, either, and we know it was used as a given name in England.
The term survives in coxswain, the person who manages the boat in crew.
It’s also sometimes heard as an old school synonym for suitor or boyfriend. In that sense, it’s a little like beau.
And, of course, it’s a fairly common surname. Just like Blake or Blair or Sloane, it has potential.
IS SWAIN USED AS A GIVEN NAME?
Swain has been used in tiny numbers over the years. The US Social Security Administration reports on any name given to five or more boys or girls in a single year of birth, tracing back as far as 1880.
The last year Swain appears in that data is 1987, with 10 births.
That is incredibly rare.
SHOULD YOU NAME YOUR SON SWAIN?
I think Swain works for your family, and here’s why:
- It fits your general style. You’ve been thinking about strong, single-syllable names for boys from the very beginning.
- Your preference is for something unusual.
- Despite being very uncommon, Swain fits with current names – both in terms of sound and that surname style.
FINDING A MIDDLE NAME FOR SWAIN
Because your son’s first name will be very unusual, I would suggest a longer, more traditional middle, or possibly something current and familiar:
- Swain Alexander
- Swain Barrett
- Swain Cassian
- Swain Maxwell
- Swain Paxton
- Swain Riley
- Swain Truett
- Swain Weston
I’m surprised by how much I like Swain Cassian and Swain Riley, but something more like Swain Alexander was my first thought, because it balances a very unusual first name with a far more conventional middle.
My first thought when I hear Swain is unfortunately Swine. If you love it, go for it. But if you’re hesitant, what about Wayne or Silas, as suggested in the comments, or:
– Lane
– Saint
– Sawyer Nicholas “Swain”
– Suede
– Sven
– Swan
– Swayze
– Sway
– Swift
– Twain
Swift and Suede are my favorites for you. But if you really love Swain, go for it!
I totally think it works, if you and your husband both love it.
As a mom who gave all of my kids names that aren’t in the top 1000, and one of which doesn’t frequently doesn’t make the data list at all, I would just say that you need to be prepared to graciously work through mispronunciations, mis-spellings, and sometimes substitutions of a close-but-not-right name. (For example, my “Emmeline” frequently gets “Emily” when she’s first introduced to older adults). People who actually care and who your kids are in relationships with (teachers, classmates, family, coaches, your family doctor, etc) will learn it and get it right. Strangers or casual aquaintances may do a double-take – although I actually think Swain is going to have it easier than my kids do because most people will start their pronunciation guessing with the noun.
I also agree with the advice to give a more common/traditional middle name. Ideally one that you also love, because there’s always the possibility that adult Swain Alexander might decide he’d rather go by “Alex”.
Congratulations on your precious son.
Swain, could be confused or teased with Slain or Swine. If that doesn’t bother you, but something to consider.
I also agree with the comment “ItsWayne”
People could easily hear this.
If you like the letters S.I.A. you might like Silas.
It goes well with your surname and also fits a longer traditional middle name.
Silas Kella-her sounds handsome and distinguished but also so cute for the baby and toddler years.
All the best
Xx
It’s easy enough to clear up confusion by spelling it out, 5 letters doesn’t take much effort even if one of them is a W.
Also, while it’s not one I’ve heard as a given name, it’s also not one that I’d be surprised by or question if I saw it on a class list. If you love it and agree on it, I think you’re good to go!
I keep going back and forth on this, so I’ll share why I’m of two minds.
I *love* how the name came to you in a dream. That’s an amazing story to tell your child! It sounds like your journey to parenthood involved a lot of planning and heartache, so it’s a gift to have a moment of sudden, joyful inspiration like this.
I like that the name is uncommon but recognizable, and the sounds of the name are pleasing. It makes me think of the French actor Swann Arlaud, which makes it feel sophisticated and cosmopolitan.
I don’t think it’s an issue that you’ve gotten blank stares and online pushback. That comes with the territory of any unconventional name. I don’t think a crowd-pleasing name would feel right for you.
Here’s where I struggle: in literature, “swain” is usually pejorative. Yes, the dictionary definition is simply “farmer” or “peasant”, but it usually has a connotation of being uncultured and servile. Shakespeare writes about the “obscure and lowly swain”, while William Cullen Bryant mentions the “rude swain” in his poetry.
(This is how it came to mean “suitor” or “boyfriend”, by the way. The idea is that a man in love shows submissive devotion to the woman he admires.)
So, I would probably not use Swain as a first name, unless it came from my family tree or was an honor name of some kind. But that’s me, the former English major.
I think if you take in all the feedback and still feel like Swain is the name to beat, you should go for it. What’s most important is that you can share your child’s name with confidence, conviction, and openness to how he’ll carry it and reshape its significance as he grows.
If you’re open to alternatives, you might consider:
Sawyer
Soren
Sven (same origin as Swain)
Best of luck making your decision!
Congratulations on baby boy coming! Very exciting!
I agree with what Abby said – it sounds like you have always had a unique/one-syllable naming style and Swain meets that criteria! If you and your husband are head over heels on it then go for it. I know a young boy named Smith and it’s really nice! Swain reminds me of this in that it’s a definite last-name-as-first. I also know a family with Swain as their last name so the name isn’t confusion to pronounce for me personally.
My advice though is to perhaps refrain from asking your family and friends their name opinions. Everyone has their own unique naming style and so naturally you aren’t going to hit a home run with a name EVERYONE enjoys no matter which name you pick. A name will always be “too popular, too unique, too gender-neutral, too too too…” to others. The main thing is whether you and your husband love it and imagine calling your baby boy that :).
Enjoy your pregnancy and baby boy in a couple months!
I like Swain. I think it sounds and looks quite nice. And if it’s questioned, explaining it as “Swain, like Twain” seems simple enough.
All names have their issues. We have a close friend whose son is named Max, who gets asked if it’s actually Maxwell, Maximus, or Maximillian? No, just Max. His Mom thought he was giving him an easy name that wouldn’t be questioned. You just never know.
And as a parent and school volunteer in a very diverse school, there are so many names I’d never heard of before, but the kids learn them quickly. Names I hadn’t thought of ten years ago now seem quite normal, so if Swain is a name you love, then go for it.
As for middle names, I do think Swain sounds best with a two to four-syllable middle name that’s a bit more common.
Let us know what you choose, and enjoy your son!