Name Help is a series at Appellation Mountain. Every week, one reader’s name questions will be discussed. We’re relying on thoughtful comments from the community to help expectant parents narrow down their name decisions. Thank you in advance for sharing your insight! To have your question considered, email appmtn (at) gmail. Looking for your own private #namehelp post? Order one here.
OUR DAUGHTER NAMED HERSELF
Kirsten writes:
We named our daughter Loretta Elise and did not plan to use a nickname. But she couldn’t say Loretta at first, and it came out sounding like Lola.
Now that’s the name we call her almost all of the time and the name everyone in our life uses, too – friends, family, at school.
Lola is almost six, and we thought she might be our only. But she is going to be a big sister this summer.
We’re excited, but we’re also a little anxious. Every time we think we like a name, I want to think of what it might end up sounding like or how it might be changed.
Probably this is just overthinking. My husband says he’s fine with any of these names, and we really just need to commit to one and accept that whatever happens will work out fine, just like Lola’s name surprised us, but we really love.
I know he’s right, but could you help us with our current list? I think we might be open to new suggestions, though my husband tends to say that he likes these names and isn’t really interested in talking about new ones.
- Asher
- Julian
- Miles
- Otis
- Rowan
Our last name starts with a D and ends with a Y. We are leaning towards the middle name Malcolm, for a family friend, but we might also use James or Ridge/Ridgely.
Please read on for my response and leave your thoughtful suggestions in the comments.
NAMING A BROTHER FOR LOLA
Abby replies:
Congratulations on your new son!
It sounds like there are two issues here:
- First, while you love your daughter’s name, your style is a little more elaborate Loretta than breezy Lola. So which name do you match? The one you chose with so much careful consideration, or the upbeat nickname that you use everyday?
- Second, you’ve already experienced the ways that names can surprise us. It’s natural that you’re thinking out every possible iteration of a name.
And … I’m going to address both questions by not really addressing either question, because …
It sounds like your preferred style of name for a son is different – and will likely sidestep most of these issues.
Parents sometimes bristle at the idea of having a different naming style for a son versus a daughter, but it’s pretty typical. For the most part, the names you’ve listed are a little bit shorter and far less susceptible to nicknaming. Is there a universe where Otis becomes Odie? Sure. But it’s not automatic.
As a bonus, I can hear most of these names with Loretta or Lola, which means they really are solid choices.
WHICH NAME WORKS BEST FOR LOLA’S BROTHER?
I’m going to rank your options in terms of how well they work as a brother for Lola (and Loretta), as well as their nickname-proof qualities.
5. OTIS
I think Lola and Otis share a sort of carefree, vintage vibe. That’s also true for Loretta and Otis. I hesitate only because I can easily imagine Otis becoming Odie, especially when pronounced by a child. If that works for you, then I might move Otis to the very top spot. But since it’s a potential concern, I’m keeping it at the bottom of the list.
4. ROWAN
Lola and Rowan becomes Lo and Ro. At least in my brain. It’s not necessarily a bad thing, but it feels like something you’d probably prefer to avoid.
3. MILES
I almost think Miles is perfect. It’s nickname-resistant, and has a sort of high-energy, throwback appeal that works with your daughter’s formal name and nickname. But I just think that two other choices on your list are even a little better …
2. JULIAN
What I love about Julian: it’s a little bit longer, just like Loretta. And it has a sort of antique, gentlemanly vibe that could work really well. It feels like the short forms, Jules and maybe even Jude, could be appealing and predictable in a way that Loretta-called-Lola was not.
1. ASHER
Probably Asher ends up answering to Ash some of the time, but that feels more like Bennett called Ben or Emily shortened to Em – the same name. Asher is slightly different in style from Loretta or Lola, but I think that’s why I love this choice for you. It’s distinctive, addresses your concerns, and yet still sounds like a strong choice for a brother for Lola.
Overall, my favorites are probably Asher Malcolm or Julian Ridge, or maybe Miles Ridgely. But none of these are bad choices, in any way, and if you asked me tomorrow? It’s very possible I would re-sort my rankings ever-so-slightly.
Readers, over to you! What would you name a brother for Loretta “Lola” Elise?
A word of caution on the name Asher… the ‘sh’ sound can be quite tricky for young speakers.
Some names are just easy to mistake when being shouted, too (like Axel).
Otis is incredibly perfect, and he might get the nickname of ‘O’ (we know a young Ford whose little sister calls him ‘O’ because ‘Ford’ is hard to say when you’re two). Otis Malcolm D—y? Amazing.
Congratulations and best wishes!
I love that Lola chose her name. She may have chosen her brother’s name too, sounds like, if she was younger now 😉 But the only name on your list likely to be misspoken by early talkers is Julian. I like Abby’s nickname idea of Jude for that (especially with Lola) so I’d lead with that.
I like Otis best. I would go to ‘Oats’ as nickname more intuitively than Odie. I have yet to meet one, and it gives off the same vintage vibe as Loretta, to me. Also Miles nn Milo would be darn cute with Lola.
The other names are fine, but less sparkly next to sister’s name. (I know you’re working with your list but I’d tweak Asher to Cassian or Jasper or Alistair / Rowan to Rhodes or Rueben or Russell.)
Good luck!
Any of those names work well with both Loretta and Lola, so unless you want to pick another long name and let him pick a nickname, you don’t need other options.
I like Julian and Otis with Loretta/Lola.
You seem to like names with strong O sounds, so maybe these ones:
Jonathan/Jonah
Victor/Thor
Theodore/Thor
Redmond/Monty
Or if you prefer a different sound:
Alastair/Alan
Griffin/Finn
Reuben/Ben
Ezekiel/Zeke
Sebastian/Ian
Wilfred/Fred
Oh, Magnus/Gus!
I second Otis for Lola’s brother. I think it is spunky and this matches well with Loretta/Lola. I love the name Julian, but it seems more traditional, and I like Asher, but I actually don’t get any sort of vibe from Asher either way. To me, Asher is a name that might be outshone by Lola. (I don’t know if this makes sense though.)
A couple of additional options:
Linus … Linus & Lola
Lionel … Lionel & Lola
Roscoe … Roscoe & Lola
Best wishes!
From your list, I think Julian would be my pick. He matches the length of Loretta but the energy of Lola. I think Miles would be my second pick.
Any chance you would consider Malcolm as a first name? Loretta and Malcolm. Lola and Malcolm. Lola and Mac. Lola and Cal
I know you said your husband isn’t really interested in new suggestions but just because it’s fun to come up with ideas:
August – Gus
Isaac- Zac, Ike, or Zeke
Solomon – Sonny
Charles – Arlo, Chase
Nathaniel – Nat
Henry – Hank, Hal
Edward- Teddy
Wesley – Wes
Otis sounds pretty much like what I would imagine with Loretta. I don’t necessarily see Odie unless you take his first and last initials. Otis James and O.J. Would be worse. The first name that popped into my head when I saw the headline was Gus, which could be short for August, Augustus, Gustave, or Angus.